I brought my mom to the hospital tonight. She's 85 and has CHF. It's been a very frustrating year. She only got bad this past winter/spring when she had an pneumonia-like infection. She waited and waited to go to the doctor, until I finally convinced her she needed more than bed rest. That started a downward spiral.
I don't have the room to go into all the details, other than she waits until things are at DEFCON 5 before she'll consider medical intervention. A few weeks ago she started filling up with fluids, her legs became so swollen it caused non-healing leg wounds (btw, she's not diabetic). The wound doctor had to convince her she needed to talk to her cardiologist, who took her off Lasix and put her on different, stronger diuretics. They did the trick, but now she's dehydrated. I called her cardiologist yesterday, meds were changed. But she fell today.
So now she's in the hospital. She hasn't been eating much or drinking much. And the hospital doctor just called me and gave me grief about her not eating.
What can I do? She's 85, with all her mental faculties sharp. If she refuses to eat or tell anyone how badly she feels, what am I supposed to do? I can hardly hold her down and force food down her throat?
I'm so very frustrated! Every elderly site you go into tells you "don't treat them like children!" Well, then how do I "make" her eat, go to the doctor, etc?
I have great support from my family, but she's my mom and I feel like she's my responsibility. And tonight, I am feeling very alone.