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Dad is 76, 9 months post stroke/seizure. He came home last December and improved slowly in cognition up to now. Became weak from stroke but did not have any paralysis. Weak to the point that he required assistance walking to bathroom and self-care dependent. He had been up until few days ago climb over tub and stand in tub 10-15 minutes for me to wash him and helped him stepped out. A few days ago, however his legs became weak that he is not able to do this and even assisted walking, he is not able to reach washroom like before. Cognition has not been altered. Food/water intake still strong but his mobility is next to nothing now that i had to pull out the wheelchair again. Not sure what is causing this? Mom and I just thought that we changed his sleeping position recently where he laid on his side, but legs might be cramped because he DOES NOT move all night from this position. I am worried because without mobility, we can’t provide care for him. It was a rough try with a bath bench to shower him tonight. I don’t know what to do but I am so scared of the ER. I wish I will never have to bring him in ever again.

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Don't be afraid to take him in to be evaluated - it's the facts that are frightening not those who bear the message, and those don't change just because you refuse to acknowledge them.
I think you need to make a plan for the next phase of his life because even if he recovers somewhat it sounds like the days where he can walk are numbered. Caregiving becomes harder but is still doable when a wheelchair becomes necessary, once they lose the ability to stand and pivot it becomes exponentially harder.
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If he hasn’t been getting physical therapy, look into that for him. Good luck!
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Are you using a hand held shower head? Makes bathing on a shower chair much easier. If no bars in the tub, think about getting them. It costs money, but think about taking out the tub and putting in a walk in shower. There are bars that go over the side of the tub to help with getting in and out. Here is one my nephew uses

https://tinyurl.com/pfesp285

Your Dad may be having mini-strokes that no one is aware of. Time to have him re-evaluated by his doctor. He needs labs. Could be a number of problems. Yes, his doctor can order in home physicsl therapy. I see no need for ER its not an emergency. Just get an appt with his doctor.
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See if his doctor can order in home PT for him to see if that may help, but in the meantime you and your mom can just give him bed baths if necessary so no one gets hurt trying to get him in and out of the shower.
You can order extra large body wipes and waterless shampoo and conditioner caps on either Amazon or Walmart.com. to use for the bed baths, or just fill a basin with warm water and some soap and go to town.
I wish you all well.
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NeedLove2 Aug 18, 2023
To touch on the shower chair and bars. If her dad is a veteran, there is a good chance the VA will pay for a walk-in tub. I know many vets who got theirs paid for. My dad had back issues ans neuropathy ans TIA'S. He is a vet but not aware he could get that paid for so he financed one. Luckily the VA will pay benefits owed to my dad due to lack of knowledge of coverage. I'm working on that for them.
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Did he go to rehab after stroke?

Have you called his PCP to report new weakness?
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A good medical workup is needed to evaluate what can be helped and what cannot, what PT or rehab might work, and what to do if nothing will. You are correct that you may not be able to continue to care for Dad at home if he cannot improve to some extent. I am so sorry. Discuss with the doctor.
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Confer with phone call to his PCP about any changes or observations. If you do think it is urgent do call 911.
Perhaps his PCP could do a new assessment or refer home care services to him and they can provide professional input to PCP , perhaps could assess if he needs additional at home PT also or other levels of care needs.
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I would ask his primary care Dr for home health PT/ OT services that can come out to the house. Get a shower chair for in the shower so he doesn’t have to stand long.
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I know you are afraid of the ER. However, this type of change in function would be most quickly evaluated through the ER. Look online in your area for a hospital with an excellent rating for caring for stroke (primarily) and orthopedic (secondarily) problems. Go to their ER.

Second best option is an urgent appointment with his doctor. He or she should get a referral to a neurologist, an orthopedic doctor, and physical therapy. From these specialists, you can get a good work-up to discern what is going on.
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It happened to my husband as well.
Walking one day, unable to move next day.
He has Parkinson’s disease for over 10 years, although diagnosed in 2015, his GP mentioned it in 2012.
He went to hospital end of June and had every test done, no stroke, hearth problems, dementia, nothing!
As healthy as somebody 30 years old.
And not due to Parkinson’s as every specialist agreed with that. And he had entire team of specialists taking care of him.
And nothing conclusive after 3 weeks of tests, MRIs, Catscans, ultrasounds.
Right now doing physiotherapy helped, he regained strength.
Strangely enough his friend had something similar some months ago and nothing was found and he has no neurological conditions.
Not to scare you but some things will remain a mystery.
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