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I have spent the past couple of days trying to get a hospice referral for my dad. I already anticipated that it would be a nightmare since we deal with the VA, which I am starting to HATE, so I tried to get a referral from Dad's pulmonologist.


The pulmonologist wants to defer to the incompetent VA doctor who requires an appointment for EVERYTHING and then rushes Dad through his appointment. This is the same doctor that sent Dad home after I brought him in for non-stop vomiting. He gave Dad Zofran and suggested some Pepto Bismol. Thankfully, I had the foresight to take Dad to the ER for a second opinion. The ER admitted him immediately and he was in surgery an hour later for an incarcerated hernia. Needless to say, I have NO faith in this doctor who answers his cell phone during appointments.


Sorry about that rant. Anyway, this doctor is AWFUL and I'm still going back and forth with Dad's psychiatrist to give him something else to calm him down. My question is, can I circumvent this red tape? I'm sure Dad qualifies for hospice with his current diagnosis.


It's clear that Dad is going to leave us. I just don't want it to be with him gasping for air or in a confused and anxious state. No one seems to care that he's in turmoil right now and so am I.

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I reached out to two hospice providers (is that the correct term?), and one is in the process of speaking to the VA on my behalf.

UPDATE: The psychiatrist wants to put Dad on Depakote! I'm not feeling comfortable with that. I've been reading horror stories about it. I want Dad to be calmer, but not a zombie. I think I will wait for Hospice...
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I'm very sorry for you and your dad going through this terrible time. I totally agree. Contact hospice on your own. I hope you are doing it now.
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Call your local hospice and explain the situation, telling them you are getting no where with this doctor and that you need for them to get the ball moving on a hospice evaluation. Hospice is a big-time money maker. There will be a hospice that will take the business, so to speak, if your father qualifies.
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Contact Hospice on your own - self referral. It's a mediCARE benefit, 100% covered. You can use their doc to review the chart and for all other needs. They are wonderful! I prefer a not for profit hospice, but you can interview several. Actually, as desperate as you are, just call one, and go to the next one if they don't qualify him!
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