Follow
Share
Read More
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Find Care & Housing
I would prepare very small amounts. I think that the appetite leaves. There is much craziness around the broken brain and food. I doubt mom is fully competent now. If she is, that eases the answer here: you prepare food, she choose whether she will eat it now or later or not at all. If, however, she no longer has a fully competent mind I think Geaton has some great ideas for you.
Have healthy fruits around, even dried fruits, and yogurt.
Remember, the appetite usually lessens and the need for sleep becomes more. That's aging.
Helpful Answer (6)
Report

Today's Menu;

Take it or Leave it!
Helpful Answer (9)
Report
Cally2024 Sep 2024
She does threaten to tell people I'm not giving her enough food and I'm being mean to her. I'm not being mean to her. I don't want to get into trouble just because I can't be her food gopher and can't afford for her waste
(1)
Report
See 1 more reply
I agree that you give her a choice and after that, she can access whatever "easy" food is available, or snacks - nothing that requires even microwaving. My MIL and SFIL used to have apple slices and popcorn for dinner every Sunday night. Now you can buy popped popcorn in bags at the grocery store. Yogurt, etc. At 84 I wouldn't fret about "nutritious" meals for her too much. I used to tell my family "The kitchen is closed!", meaning I'm done helping you find, prep or cook food. Then walk out of the kitchen and get on with the rest of your day.
Helpful Answer (8)
Report

Sounds like you live with your mother or she does with you, but either way, since it's up to you to provide food for her, just give her 2 food choices(that you yourself would like since you'll be preparing it and hopefully eating it too)like would you rather have a hamburger and small salad or piece of baked chicken with mac n cheese for supper/lunch?
If she says neither, then you tell her that those are her ONLY 2 choices and if she doesn't want those she'll just have to have a bowl of cereal. When she gets hungry enough she'll take one of the 2 choices given to her.
As long as you continue to give in to her whims, she'll continue to take advantage of you, so put a stop to it today, as someone has to be the adult in this situation.
Helpful Answer (7)
Report
MargaretMcKen Sep 2024
I'd forget the 'two choices'. My kids got 'dinner', not a choice. I've never heard of a family meal where there were two options, though with serving dishes it's always possible to 'skip the rhubarb' if you don't like it.
(7)
Report
I think you should feel lucky that your mom still has enough of an appetite to ask for food. Since at some point she won't.

As someone else suggested, get her whatever she wants but only dish out a small portion of it. If she eats it all, then give her more. If she doesn't, keep it in the fridge and give it to her the next time she asks or eat it yourself. You don't have to let her know it's leftovers. Just tell her you just got it.
Helpful Answer (6)
Report
sp196902 Sep 2024
"I think you should feel lucky that your mom still has enough of an appetite to ask for food. Since at some point she won't."

Lucky is not how I would describe it. More like frustrating and annoying and irritating. I can't believe OP has been catering to her mother for 2 years. That's a long time to continue being a slave to her mother over eating 3 meals a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year.
(10)
Report
See 3 more replies
'Wasting food' usually means leaving dished food on the plate. If you use serving dishes, and only put a small spoonful at a time on her plate, she can't 'waste' so much. What's left in the serving dishes is clean, untouched, and can be dished up next time. It's not 'left-overs', it's what's available. You aren't running a short order cook shop. Don't produce food you know she dislikes, but forget the 'special requests'.

I've been doing this for 30 years, with children and adults. It saves a lot of food and a lot of annoyance.
Helpful Answer (16)
Report
Cally2024 Sep 2024
I don't give her food she dislikes and I already give her appropriate portions
(1)
Report
See 1 more reply
Watch the Bugs Bunny cartoon, "Shiskabugs".
Helpful Answer (3)
Report
Peasuep Sep 2024
I know this is not a laughing matter to Cally but omg cover, you made my night!
(6)
Report
See 5 more replies
Cally, does your mom live with you? And how would she know if something is ‘left-over’? Can you pack her refused food up and freeze it until the next time she asks for it?

Better yet, maybe give her a nightly menu with one simple option, for instance,
Tonight’s menu:
(Whatever you’ve planned for your family), or
Grilled cheese and tomato soup
Period.
You can dress it up however you want, i.e. Four cheese panini with tomato basil bisque!
Helpful Answer (8)
Report
Beatty Sep 2024
Your meal or the ONE alternative: bread and water.

My Grandparents cure-all for fussy eaters.
(14)
Report
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter