My husband died intestate last year. I tried to get him to put things in a trust but he wouldn't do it. We jointly owed 10 acres and house. He owned 10 acres that joined it. He did give me power of attorney to put my name on that 10 acres which I did before his death. After closing out his Type7 FFL with SOT2 license with the ATF, and transferring all NFA SBR's to his son (around 23 items) I'm having issues. I'm 64 and have had to move to take care of my own mother (85) who is going blind. After leaving my home, his son went into my house (he lives across the road on part of the 20 acres) boxed up all my clothes and some items and moved into the house. I didn't care, and had told him they could stay there during the winter because we have a wood heater and it stayed warmer in there. I was NOT happy that he cleared out all my drawers and closet though! (This was several months after my husband's death.) I said all that to say this, every time I go back to get things, I feel like I'm an intruder. I just went yesterday to haul my tractor to my mom's and was met with hostility even though I have the bank papers where I was a co-signer on the loan. I was yelled at, belittled, accused of 'killing his dad' (which died from cancer) AND accused of receiving a Camp LeJeune settlement and not dividing it. I did file, I have NOT received anything. When I left with the tractor, after I closed the gate and then shut the door on my vehicle I heard 3 rifle rounds shot from the house. I don't know where the barrel was aiming as I only HEARD it. The text messages I get from the daughter and niece are berating, accusatory and hostile. "You promised dad you'd make sure they were okay." "You're getting dad's monthly money so you should be sending them what they need." I already pay for both house's electricity down there and now my own here. I pay for the internet service down there. I pay for the truck insurance and license which his dad gave him YEARS ago and he never had the title transferred into his name. He doesn't have a DL either!
I'm sorry for unloading but this is going to kill me literally. I'm having health issues due to the massive amount of stress being put on me and then to have him punctuate his displeasure with shot fired? HELP! I need advice!
The mistake that you made was trusting his children. Honestly I luv my step kids, but in the end I know I will be blamed for anything and everything that happens. I heard that the camp lujeune , has not been settled yet, someone I know is on the list also.
Get a lawyer and call the police!! They have no rights here. Your kindness was taken advantage of, you gave them an inch, they took a mile.
First of all, you will have to, if you are appointed administrator of the estate, settle the estate. If you apply, then as his wife, you will likely be appointed.
Use a good Trust and Estate Attorney to liquidate and divide all of the estate as it should be divided according to the laws of the state. In some states all goes to the widow. In others children and widows divide. All states are different. Because there IS an estate here this must be done ASAP given the family issues, with a Trust and Estate Attorney at the helm.
Your mom may need to go into care while this is being accomplished.
I doubt you would like to live nearby to this family now hubby is gone, so you may wish to return home after the year it will take to settle this.
Meanwhile there should be no allowing anyone into your home and your clothing. Your poor decision making has ruined any boundaries there were in that regard. Your having let them in once saying you "don't care" has already muddied waters under the law.
To be honest, from your description YOU may be in real danger, so make certain your OWN will is in order.
Without expert help this cannot be handled.
Do know that you are not alone in families that meld in this messy manner, without your hubby having taken care of business (Trusts and Wills) and without his explaining what would be what to his children.
When this happens you are left Queen on top of a heap of dirt, and in your own case, perhaps even in mortal danger.
An attorney letter to all potential heirs will deliniate what happens under the law if they continue their transgressions in this manner.
So, again, you really don't need a forum of strangers so much as you need experts in your own area. So sorry for your loss and for the added issues of your mother's illness.
Were it me I would be selling this home that was yours jointly and now yours at once. You are going to need liquid assets. This all, along with Mom, could get very expensive with flying back and forth.
This son needs to understand that because his Dad did not make a Will, he really left him and his family nothing. It hasn't to be now straighten out with a lawyer. And Dads monthly money would have died with him if he had not had a wife. Son and his family are not entitled to it. Get that lawyer.
Now, his son has no right to remove your things from your legal residence. Your home is not his legal home. You should have called the police when you did this, but since you did not you may not get your items back.
You're getting 'Dad's monthly money' because you are his legal spouse. Whatever they think you "promised" dad doesn't amount to squat unless they have it in legal writing.
Call the police and seek a restraining order against these people. It doesn't matter if they are his children or not.
Your husband made you POA for him. Not his kids you. So here's how everything gets settled. File the Will. Did your husband make out a Will? Usually people do this when they do POA. If he did not do one, you as his legal spouse automatically get HALF of his estate and this is so in all 50 states.
Get yourself to a lawyer and the police right away. Go to the police first and have your step-son forcibly removed from your house if necessary. And if they want to get cute and start firing off rounds, you leave and go somewhere else. Have cameras set up around the property that you don't let them know about. They are cheap to do and can be concealed easily. Or have someone come and stay with you so you're not alone. Or fire back. Let these spoiled, entitled, adult brats know that you're not going to be intimidated by their games.