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what if anything can she do? she lives in Ohio and yes she is legally responsible for the caregiving and her mother has been kicked out of nursing homes

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A lot of us here go through it. Many parents are less than nice. There is a wealth of posts here from people with difficult parents. Give your friend the url to this site and tell her she'll find many people going through the same thing. It is a great place to vent, because people understand. There's not really a lot we can do when someone has dementia and is abusive. We can leave the room when things get bad. Of course if it is too bad we can leave permanently. Your friend is in a bad spot, though, with her mother being put out by the NH. It paints here more in the corner.

Let her know we're here to talk to.
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KarenChes, tell your friend to have her mother checked for a UTI [urinary tract infection] as that can cause abusive behavior in an elder.
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