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She called Dad's Hospice provider and APS on me, and I wasn't even in the home. I find the fraud, and manipulation of care givers to be overwhelming. I moved Dad, but meetings wer held without my knowledge or presence and reports filed about me that I just found out about. What would it take to form a non-profit advocacy program to provide support for family members who are goint it alone, and have no form of support or protection against this kind of abuse.

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Always get second opinions when someone tells you funds are protected from Medicaid. They will usually allow a certain amount for funerals, but Medicaid will give you a list, as SS said. An estate attorney should know, but you need to make sure they know their laws. Get references.

Carol
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Does anyone now what kind of funds Medicaid wont touch in the state of New York?
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Dear Jander, we share your shock and dismay! Sounds like it's time for a little undercover work of your own. Do a background check on this person, and you may find similar skeletons lurking in their past. Cover yourself in all areas. Be careful of your communications and contact with said "caregiver," and get your Physician's support and help. While we don't know the particulars, we support you in spirit. I'm praying for your situation. Let us know how it all works out.

Dear roxlang, we secured a funeral contract for our parents. There are other ways, as well. Have you contacted an Elder Law Attorney? Be careful who you trust, and get second opinions. I did it all for my parents, without an attorney, by paying off past debt. You can talk to Medicaid themselves, and they can supply you with a list of guidelines.
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Tell her to leave. Report her behavior to her employer. Do not pay for services under which she was contracted to do.
Norene
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That sounds wonderful, however, not realistic. The group homes as well as corporate facilitis recieve a hefty deposit ranging from $1,000 to a full month rent, which could be as high as $8,000. The employer refused to speak with me, and called my Hospice provider telling them that I had caused an upset and tried to remove Dad that night. As it now stands, I did move Dad to another facility, but left my deposit on the table, which the owner is refusing to return, because I did not give 30 day notice. I only found out about them attempting to move Dad that night, by contacting Hospice and getting a copy of the notes relating to Dad. The owner of the home has refused to provide a copy of the "incident" report to me, or any care giver notes from the date of the alleged incident. The group homes and corporate facilities have been covering their ass..ets, much longer than I have been trying to get to the truth, and have mastered the art of deflecting responsibility.
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Dear Jander, so sorry to hear you had to find out the hard way. What a grievous situation. Don't suppose it's worth a legal battle, unless you have to defend yourself... (Can you access free Senior legal services for Dad? Many counties have them...) Are you Dad's legal Guardian? They couldn't refuse your request, then. What's your next step? How are you and your Dad doing? Praying God provide another open door for you. You take care!
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I have already spent over $200.000.00 on legal fees. Yes I am Dad's legal guardian, but no one cares. They still refuse. I could certainly get the court to make them comply, but they would simply rewrite the notes by that time. This is all about covering up care giver abuse and neglect.
I relocated Dad to another group home and he seems contented. He asked me to please not make him go back to the former home. He stated they watched me every move I mace, they didn;t like me, and would not let me talk to you on the phone. He said they always talked about you when you left. The home he is in now is happy and light.

I have learned that attorneys are expensive and really have no control except by going to court which has proven to be cost prohibitive. That's why we as adult children must advoicate for our parents. The system is more experienced in fraud, and deceit, and have many "games" they run on family members who know too much. I had one director in a former facility state to me "Let the games begin" I now understand what she was referring to. I am writing a book on my personal experiences that hopefully will open eyes to the neglect and abuse that our parents go through in their senior years.

Thanks so much.
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