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We have run into an unexpected issue with my MIL's incontinence underwear. She has been using the XL Assurance brand from Walmart for 2-3 years now and they've been great until recently. She has begun complaining that they are tight around her stomach. We checked compared to some older pairs we still had and they haven't changed. MIL has changed.



She has been slowly losing weight over the past couple years (about 3-5lbs a month) and we think the loose skin on her stomach is filling up the waist of the underwear more. She’s cutting the sides to let her stomach overhang but she’s still uncomfortable. She wants to go up in size to XXL, but I’m not sure that will be effective as she may leak from the legs.



Any suggestions for brands or generics that work well for loose stomach skin or bigger stomachs in general? Preferably the pull-up style and currently only for bladder incontinence. She’s 5’ 180lbs and bigger around the bottom if that helps. Figured I would ask before throwing money at random small packs of other brands to try out.



Also, any suggestions on where to get samples of incontinence underwear? I was looking at a highly suggested website mentioned elsewhere, but the samples were for regular diaper styles. I haven’t delved much into name brand websites for samples quite yet.

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I don’t remember the brand name of the one that my mom used. She had the opposite problem. My mother was tiny. I had to buy the smallest size

Why don’t you try the next size up in the same brand? Just buy one package to see if the size works for her. Your mom will let you know if they aren’t fitting her properly.
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I guess I would have the doctor look into the cause of the weight loss.
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Check the Men's incontinence underwear.
Most of them will list waist size and it might be that one of the men's would fit better.
It might also be that a Tab brief would fit better than a pull up one.
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NeedHelpWithMom Jan 2023
What a great tip!

The same is true for men’s shoes. Some women buy men’s shoes to get a better fit.

My daughter had a friend that played on her volleyball team. She was 5’ 11” tall and wore a size 11 shoe. She could never find her size in the women’s section of the store but always found her size in the men’s section.

She automatically started shopping for her athletic shoes in the men’s department of the shoe store.
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Try the brand Liv Dry from Amazon. I also put two Poise pads and two pull ups on each night. No leaks. Hope that helps. Mom leaks very little with this brand, and my nighttime routine.
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Walmart has an off site supplier brand of no leak panties that hold 20 oz.. I tested with 16 oz. of water. However they did have some leakage around the leg. They are expensive, around $20-25 each, but they are washable. Design Comfort has an excellent selection, including high waist. Also washable, There are frequent sales. There are washable snap on pads, but they don't hold much. Haven't tried Knix yet, they are next. I usually wear long heavy pads with heavy no leak panties when I am going out for a couple of hours. I know where all the bathrooms are when I go shopping. Good Luck.
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A few thoughts and ideas:

Maybe there is another reason for them feeling uncomfortable. I would rule out new medical issues such as bloating, constipation, water retention. I don't know why the regular weight loss, but whatever is causing that may be causing other symptoms of discomfort.

Near me they have a "donor closet". People or stores donate unused extras, which are sold at a deep discount. You can get samples, smaller packs or inexpensive larger packs.

In hindsight, I would have kept everything my Mom didn't use. Everything seemed to have a use later, as she deteriorated.

Incontinence tea. 🌝 My Mom suffered from the worst incontinence our care agency had seen. Bell's Lifestyle bladder tea. All natural and very good for you. It is guaranteed, and they aren't kidding. We did just 1 mug per day. After 2 weeks, pure magic! Only $20-30 per month. Hot or cold, pleasant taste. My Mom didn't like tea and resisted it, but we also pushed water, so she soon saw the tea as a nice alternative and looked forward to it.

Best of luck and God bless!
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My mother lost 30lbs over 2 yrs. The doctor says the older Seniors don't eat that much anymore. Also, they lose muscle mass which means weight loss. Even though she lost that weight, she never lost her stomach. Loose skin comes from the skin not being elastic anymore. I found that Serenity from Walgreens tended to be bigger in the stomach area. Depends went under her belly button but the Serenity went over her whole stomach.

Using mens is a good idea. But remember boys diapers and girls diapers are different. Boys pee in the front so more padding in front. Girls pee towards the back, so more padding there.
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NeedHelpWithMom Feb 2023
Great point about the padding being in a different spot. Hadn’t thought about that but that makes a huge difference.

So many seniors lose their appetite. My mom barely ate as she aged. I cooked all of her favorite meals and she still didn’t eat much.
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My mother’s body habitus is similar. After use of an Always product, she complained of skin irritation. Found a site, ‘Carewell’, on line to buy larger quantities and a brief she loves, Tena Proskin Protective Incontinence Underwear for Women. Case of 72 for $45.99. They deliver within 2-3 days.
Good luck!
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I've been using Abri-Flex Premium Level 3 (L3 on the packaging). They are pull ups and for the overnight I use a booster -- Eterna Dry in large (and these boosters are very long and wide). My mom is about 150 and 5'1' and she uses the size large in the Abri-Flex. Seems to work fairly well.
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Hrbowman: Perhaps you can opt for men's incontinence briefs.
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UPDATE: I bought her women's 2XL as well as some men's L/XL in the brand she likes. She said the women’s XXL are doing better, but she still feels pressure aside from the underwear discomfort.
 
We have an appointment with her GP to check on her lower abdomen. The pressure sounds like a separate issue. She had complained about the pressure a few times in the past couple months and we thought it might be trapped gas which it very well may be. But she’s been complaining a lot more often as of late.  She is on morphine for pain and experiences chronic constipation so we want to make sure she’s not impacted, has a UTI, or somehow developed ascites which would mean a much bigger problem. Her blood work a few months ago was fine. She is on lactulose for constipation but may need an adjustment in dosage.
 
As far as the weight loss goes, this is monitored by her doctor. She’s been overweight for decades and fell for a lot of fad/yo-yo dieting in the past. She switched to a mostly vegetarian diet a few years ago and has kept to it with great success. She’s lost about 70lbs over the past few years. We are having some struggles with her using Carnation Instant Breakfast as a meal replacement more than once day, but we’re actively trying to help her meal plan in a way that is balanced and nutritious.
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Llamalover47 Feb 2023
Hrbowman: Thank you for your update.
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One of the things these people want to raise awareness about weight loss, and Loose skin. When someone loses a significant amount of weight (from pregnancy or otherwise), they can end up with loose skin on their stomach and other parts of their body. This is super common—and totally and completely fine. It's what a lot of bodies do, but that doesn't mean everyone talks about it. These Instagrammers are hoping to open up a conversation about loose skin—both because it's a common part of the weight loss experience and because it's nothing to be ashamed of.
Matilda
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