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My MIL feeds the dog from her bed and has turned the "perfect dog" into a horrible begging, barking mess. No matter what I say, MIL sneaks food to the dog.......resulting in constant begging , barking, etc non stop. Another casualty of this caretaking.

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My parents have been hand feeding my dog for quite some time now. They still ask permission and I just roll my eyes and say "sure". Now the other day mom complained about alwasy having to ask my dog to move, because Mia likes to sit/lie down right by Mom's seat on the couch. I told her not to complain because she is hoping for food and Mom brought that on herself. Luckily my dog (she is a therapy dog) and will respond to the command "Leave it."
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We used to take the dog to the NH to see Nana. She would signal the dog to jump onto the bed. She knew she was breaking the NH rules and she would smile like a kid with a stolen cookie. We let her have her fun, and Nana loved it when the nurses would shriek. You are being played like a fiddle.
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sneak feeding not bidding feeding LOL don't know why computer changed that LOL
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you don't sound evil at all. I know how hard it is as I have 2 dogs and a mil with dementia too who sneaks the food right at the table to the dogs by pretending to drop food down to the dog (yes its pretend and not the disease). we only allow food at the table, no bed feedings, no couch snacks etc.
this stopped the bidding food feeding. then I keep a close eye on her and when she goes to give food to dog I just tell her don't feed the dog. if she tells me she isn't I ask her to show me her hand. it sounds harsh but we have to make the hard decisions that we know are right not only for our aging parents but for our own family too.

ITS OK TO PUT YOU AND YOUR FAMILY's NEEDS AND WANTS BEFORE YOUR AGING PARENT!
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simple fix - keep the dog out of the room when food is served and that issue disappears. work with the dog at your meal time so the dog can't come near the table. this means every bite you might have to put your fork down and heard the dog to where you will allow them to be when folks are eating. it will take a good month to retrain the dog and you have to be diligent about the training.

if mom complains just tell her the truth - you have asked her not to feed the dog for the health of the dog and you refuse to comply with your request so you have to keep the dog out if she has food. tell her when she is done and the food is cleared away (look for hidden food) the dog can come keep her company.
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It's not new behavior.....been going on since the day she moved in. My dog was very obedient until MIL began feeding her from the table, chair, bed, wherever. Her bed in in the center of my small house ........... and of course I can lock up the dog every time but MIL hides food under the covers. Sorry, I was just venting. Didn't intend to sound so evil.
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Shut the dog out of the bedroom when MIL has food. I inherited my mother's dog, very overweight and had always refused its food, preferring to fill up on cookies, toast, muffins and so on. Not happening in my house. The dogs get a small piece of biscuit when they go potty and run back inside when called and a meat, kibble and home made stock supper which they devour. No-one begs when I'm eating. They're in great shape though we've all got fat over this past nasty winter.
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If the dog is agitated and this is a new behavior, he may sense something is wrong with MIL. Dogs can smell and hear things we can't, they sense seizures and heart attacks and stroke, infections, even irregular heart beat and breathing. I would listen to the dog and check the patient when the dog is upset.
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