Mom lived with caregiver (a sister) at time. I had requested an accounting from POA (yet another sister) back in January on my mom’s trust. It was met with a lot of resistance by POA. Caregiver also became irate I asked for it. Caregiver told my mother (stage 6 Alzheimer’s) I was asking for it from POA ONLY. Caregiver got Mom very agitated by involving her verbally. Caregiver had Mom call me and videotaped her leaving me a very distressing message. I was shocked but still, the pushback occurred repeatedly by both POA and caregiver.
After several months, POA relented and told all 6 beneficiaries that accounting will be supplied. I immediately get an email from caregiver with all on cc that said ‘f you...[insert my name].
I never once was impolite with my requests.
Caregiver then tells POA in a broadcast message to either ‘eradicate’ me from the family or Mom must leave. I heard nothing further. I set up a lunch visit with Mom through POA (caregiver didn’t want to deal with me directly ever). I text Mom and tell her I’ll see her on Saturday. My caregiver sister goes berserk. Drives Mom to my sister’s and dumps her and her 2 dogs without warning. Caregiver then sends an email to get mom’s things within 24 hours. Mom was devastated and knew what she had done. Mom didn’t eat for days and was anxious. Crying. I was so angry when I saw what caregiver had done.
Two months later, Mom moves in with POA. She allows caregiver to continue to see Mom. I’m disgusted.
The accounting is still a big secret.
Is what caregiver did abuse? I would say yes. POA says that to not allow her to see Mom would be isolation. Yeah..from an abuser! WTF?
Moms trust is revocable but I understood when she became incapacitated that accounting could be requested. They’re hiding something, obviously, and I can’t get to that until Mom is gone? I know caregiver was being gifted $15000 every 3 months to care for Mom plus charging $1200 rent.
Everyone is scared of caregiver so they say and do nothing. Caregiver has long manipulated and bullied her way through life.