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Sylvie Asked February 2013
All the good-hearted advice here is not enough. We want to quit Grandma. Has anyone else been through this?
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After trying to have her live with us, she is in her 4th assisted living home. She is incorrigible and the home offers no control in monitoring her communication,allowing her to use her neighbors' cell phone although her neurologist has twice issued written orders against this because the communication is inappropriate.
Medication has not helped her mistreatment of anyone who tries to assist. This woman has narcissistic personality as well as a dementia diagnosis.
Our family would like to turn Grandma and her assets over to the state. She creates too many problems. Even her great grandchildren are deprived of their mother's attention in favor of her. Her grandson is the DPOA.
Has anyone else been through this? What might we expect?
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2 Answers
Labs4me Feb 2013
If in all agreement do it. When her assets are used up she will qualify for medicaid. She needs a more restrictive environment than assisted living.
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Leslie61 Feb 2013
Yes - if she has dementia (and it can sometimes be a little hard to differentiate dementia behaviors from narcissism in my mom), then she should probably be in a memory care place where she will be more controlled. If she doesn't have dementia (she's just an Ahole - sorry), then at least get in contact with a good therapist who can guide you in hanling the issues. The fact that she has a neurologist suggest to me she might have dementia. If money is an issue, try some of your local government aging resources. You might want to look at the book "Elder Rage" as the author has had some interesting and possibly useful experience conditioning her father's responses so that this behaviors are more manageable.
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