My father, 91, passed November 27th at 23:00. I am the nurse, the daughter, the next door neighbor. My MIL passed 13 days after. I cared for both parents since 1999. My Mom had Alzheimer's and passed in 2003. My dad had been wanting to join her...very isolative , depressed and no living friends. My brothers are both attorneys in other states and didn't really know how to "help". I needed respite care for years. As care givers, you understand how obsessed you can be with small details. I could never enjoy a meal without thinking about left-overs for my Dad. Anyway. My dad wanted no obituary, service...to be cremated. I honored his wishes. I'm unsure if my brothers even cried. I have been crying inside and out for almost 20 years. I'm desperate to sell his house and ours because the memories are too hard to bear. My Mither-in Law passed 13 days after my dad. My MIL comes from a very large family and tears, memories, poems and everything being planned for this Friday. My husband is comforting his family. I'm happy for him. I feel selfishly sad, however, that my Dads passing was not celebrated due to dysfunctional family dynamics. I of course, will attend my MIL funeral, services, etc....but it will make me sad that ( selfishly) did not receive love compassion and support of my two brothers. The excuse " I really don't know what to do"....is unacceptable. I, even though a nurse, and daughter and next door neighbor didn't always know what to do but I did something....anything and everything I could to help. I want to go away after MIL service to be alone and grieve. I want to go to a spiritual place. By myself. Any suggestions?