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I have been her primary caregiver for the past 6 years and have worked full time. I am about to retire and want to keep her at home but they have suddenly put her in an assisted living facility. I am already seeing her decline and want to bring her back home and use sitters until I retire in 4 months, and then I can move in with her. I live across the street from her so have very easy access. She does not need 24/7 care at the moment but does need help with many of her daily tasks. She was steadily improving from a fall back in September, and I wanted to postpone the move until I really could not provide the care she needed. They have completely shut me out of the decision making though i am the only one living in town and am the one to go check on her daily.

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We should all remember that the nature of dementia is that it gets worse over time, at varying rates. I think decline can be attributed mostly to the disease. My 2 cents.
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My mom is getting worse, and I floated the idea of bringing her home with me instead of assisted living, and in unison fourteen people, most of whom either were caregiving at home, or had done so in the recent past, all said, "Oh no no no! Don't do that." My mom was in an independent living facility and fading quickly. Between providing care, dealing with regular ER visits, doing finances, and coping with the emotional ups and downs, I was left with depression, elevated blood pressure, insomnia, and the occasional panic attack. And yes, I, too, have, or at least had, the stamina of super hero.

Even with help, it will still be the hardest thing you've ever done.
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What sort of decline are you seeing? Is it her dementia worsening? In dementia patients, there is often initial confusion that results from moving out of a familiar environment. But the increased socialization and activities provided by AL should be of benefit to her.
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If you have the stamina of superhero and the patience of a saint, good on you. But what you're proposing would be very difficult. If she can afford assisted living, my advice is continue with it and take an active role in administering her care to make sure she's getting what she needs from the facility. Just my $.02, from someone who has gotten a crash course in elder care over the last 18 months.
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It could be that your sibling can see the forest for the trees. Caring for someone who has Alzheimer's/Dementia [as per your profile] said memory issues will not get better, will not stay the same, will only get worse.

Maybe your siblings want to save you from doing the work of three full-time caregivers. You have been her primary caregiver but it sounds like you haven't needed to be a hand-on caregiver, thus feeding her, bathing her, helping her to the bathroom, keeping her from leaving the house, being up all night while she wanders around the house, etc.... right now it seems simple to care for her but that could change rather quickly.

What to do, take your siblings advice and put Mom in Assistant Living. Some day you will realize your siblings were looking out for your own best interest. One out of every 3 caregiver dies leaving behind the love one. Those aren't good odds.
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