My sister and I are heartbroken that we cannot seem to provide any love, comfort or just distraction for my mom when we visit. I am a nurse and feel I was good at handling her dementia until now.
As soon as my sister and I arrive to see her she starts trying to get up and get away from us. We try to distract her, change the subject, back off etc to no avail. This always progresses to her hitting and slapping us. She pulls hair, kicks, bites and has even closed fist punched me in the face. She swears, accuses us of stealing money, killing babies etc. we have talked to the staff for suggestions, tried different times of day, and different places to sit. There is not one shred of her personality left. She has over the years been on many medications but is a huge fall risk and we walk the line of safety verses over sedation.(last month she had 11 falls) I am not a cry baby but leave there in tears and just miss her so much. She will not let me hug or touch her affectionately in any way.
Does anyone have any experiences like this? I just want to love and comfort her but she hates me and I end up doing the opposite. Our relationship before dementia was exceptionally warm and loving.