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I transfered my 95 year old aunt to a secured ALF and she is in a wing with 8 apts. The residents are allowed to wander in an out of each others rooms and they have a common room at the end of the hallway where they can gather for meals or mingle, read or watch tv. She is fairly happy there except for the fact that she has witnessed one of the residents become violent with the caregivers on duty. I was told this by one of the caregivers on duty and have seen evidence of this behavior (my aunts faucet in her kitchen was bent all the way down!) had to have it replaced. And I have witnessed this resident banging on doors trying to get out. And I had a caregiver in to visit my aunt for the first week and the caregiver told me of this residents violent behavior. I was under the understanding that violent behavior would not be tolerated. For the most part this violent resident is docile and just walks up and down the hallway and will stop to say hello. But the outbursts concern me and I think this resident has the potential to do harm to other residents. What do I do? Can't they medicate this resident or make them relocate? Where would they relocate this resident? Nursing Home? I hate to move my aunt again as she is adapting and seems to be doing well. Advice on how to approach this would be appreciated.

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It seems to me that they have an obligation to assign an aide to be with him at all times to protect not only the residents but himself until they can figure out whether they can find out a cause and or solution. If you don't get satisfactory answers, call your state ombudsman if there is one. I do have sympathy for him but the safety of other frail residents to me is a higher need. This is where our system fails the elderly and the mentally ill. It is not their fault and we can do better. Why can't these facilities work with schools that are training future workers in this field and incorporate internships with school credit and pay? In fact, there should be a federal or state program that does this to create jobs and encourage young people to enter fields where employees will be needed in great numbers in the near future.
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This person has only been there a few months longer than my aunt. I am going to say something next week to the director. I am going to find out if the caregivers are reporting the behavior and if they are aware of the extent of it. The maintenance should have reported what happened to the faucet. I was there and told him how it could of happened. This behavior is not only dangerous it is aggitating the other residents and making them anxious as well. I would be too I guess if I was frail and couldn't defend myself. But on the other hand, what would they do with this person, it isn't their fault, and there is nowhere else for them to go except a mental institution and they are far and few between. It scares me to think of the population of elerly in this country that will suffer from dementia that will have this same scenario in the near future.
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Gayle, I'm surprised this person is allowed to live there! It seems to me that the facility has a potential for a major lawsuit if something bad happens to another resident or staff member.
Definitely talk to someone on the administrative staff and ask questions. This does not seem like someone who should be in this type of facility. Good luck!
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This is heartbreaking! Yes, he poses a risk to the other 7 residents, and to the staff. And where can he go that he won't pose a risk?

One of the caregivers in my support group was married to a man with dementia who periodically became violent. Nobody could figure out what triggered the episodes. She had to withdraw him from a day program, and she was distraught in trying to find a care center that would accept him.

It is certainly a problem for the care centers and for the family caregivers. And I don't know an answer! :(

I suggest that you talk to the director of nursing and ask what their plans are for dealing with this sad situation. Perhaps he has already started on a calming drug and they are monitoring the results. Perhaps he will be leaving when a bed opens up elsewhere. Maybe they have some other plan, or no plan ... but you are entitled to ask what they are doing to protect your aunt.
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