My wife's mother (77) has dementia and her father (78) has parkinson. They're no longer able to really care for themselves and so we're looking for a way to help provide more of that care ourselves. Our problem is that they would like to continue living in their home and we live pretty far from them. Staying with them when visiting is not an option and the cost of lodging is becoming a financial burden. It would be difficult but we are in a position where we could split up our time and spend half of every month with them and so we started looking into renting an apartment or small home nearby to help make this easier. Unfortunately, the cost of that is about as much or more than the mortgage on our home. With that said, would it be possible to use my wife's parents money to help us pay rent or maybe even use it to help pay for a down on a condo or small home? She does have power of attorney as they haven't been able to manage their finances for some time now. Sorry, new to all this and just looking for a way to help be around more and without killing us financially. Thanks for your help.
It appears that your motive is to be closer to them, but the answer is still no. Being POA does not give absolute free reign of their money. You are accountable for every penny. You can only reimburse yourself if you actually spent personal money on a purchase for them or on their behalf.
And splitting your time there 1/2 & 1/2 will not work either. It's a full time job (eventually, anp probably sooner than later). And eventually even being next door will not be enough. Then it's either living together or moving them to a facility.
Good luck. You have some hard decisions to make.
🙏
They also cannot gift money to the kids for rent, if at any point they may need Medicaid. You would be on the hook for paying full price for their care for an extended period of time.
If you are retired, which I guess you are if you can manage living part time in two locations, you need to keep your money for your own old age.
Your in-laws can pay for in home care, move into assisted living, or find another way to get the care they need.