How do I understand my mom with dementia?

A book you might like to read to help you deal with your Mom is "Speaking Dementia - Making Sense of It All" by Frena Davidson. It has helped tremendously as my husband and I try to talk to and understand my MIL who has severe dementia. I wish we had found the book before she got to this point. You might want to ask your Mom which "home" she wants to go to. Depending on her state of dementia she may mean the home she grew up in with her parents - which was a source of comfort and good memories. We just discovered this was the case with my MIL. We thought she meant the home she just moved out of. As it turns out she believes she can go back to her original home and her Mom will still be there waiting for her. You've done the right thing - as hard as it is - by placing her in a home. Unfortunately oftentimes caregivers have to choose a safe enviroment over the wishes - and happiness - of their parent. Good luck.