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Her dr. Declared her incompetent. My dad had a stroke 10 years ago and can't talk. He knows what's going on. He can express he's mad , he can say yes and no. But I'm sure that's not enough. Mom was and still is his poa. Im Mom's medical power of attorney. I pay their bills and I'm their caregiver but what happens now...to their house, their savings and checking? My brother already stole their car and computer.

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Marshab,
You say you have reported this to APS.
They investigated and do not think anything can/should be done.
If that's the case, then simply keep reporting what you know and let them know that when something ultimately happens the fault is on them and you will take the number of times you can called to your local council on aging and congressman/woman. Keep records and diary.

There are human rights involved here. And when there is found to be sufficient legal competency the law will not intervene. Sadly that isn't your choice. You have done what you are able. Simply keep reporting.

If truly you find that you cannot intervene you need to legally resign your POA. It becomes a worthless piece of paper at some point. These things usually come to a head with hospitalization of a catastrophy that leads to death.
You can but TRY to intervene in this for the safety of your Mom but if you find you cannot then going to an attorney to resign POA (which is how it must be done in incompetency) will put this before the courts and it is on them to decide whether to give state guardianship. At least you will know it has ALL been reported to all authorities that can possibly intervene.
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Yes it says she has vascular dementia and alzhtimers in her records. Now they labeled her as incompetent. Said they talked to us about it but they didn't. I got a letter in the mail. They appointed me medical power of attorney . Thank you I will check into that
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Mom should no longer be Dads POA. If he is competent, you need him to revolk her and assign you.
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Marshab Jun 11, 2025
That's what I said too. I told her I need to be. She doesn't want to deal with all this happening. She is getting worse though I just don't want her to think I'm pushing her. I don't have anyone helping me. My sister thinks she's too good to take care of anyone if it's not herself. They would put a cimp in her lifestyle of going on 5 cruises a year and my brother is a theif. Im so lost..
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Call APS.
They may be able to help you get emergency temporary guardianship with just a phone call from a Judge; I have seen it done in my nursing career. You can then get documentation you require and get permanent down the line, but this will allow you to function.

If your Mom has cognitive awareness enough to make you POA and understand it, you can still do this in a doctor's office. You need to get yourself on accounts as POA and only signee or brother will take everything. He should be reported to APS for elder abuse so this doesn't continue.

Call APS.
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Marshab Jun 11, 2025
I reported my sister and brother both to aps.. .the district attorney i was talking to about this all said aps isn't going to do anything sadly. My brothers boyfriend even chocked my 72 ain't which is my moms sister and then him and my brother left my mom and aunt alone before the cops got there and nothing is being done about that either
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Are you saying that it says she has dementia in her medical records? Cognitive impairment is on a sliding scale of loss of abilities. In my personal experience when I took my very elderly Aunt to see a certified elder law attorney, the attorney took her into a room to privately assess her for "capacity" and to make sure she wasn't being coerced. The bar for capacity is pretty low, so I would still call a CELA and see what they think. Sometimes they don't charge for the initial meeting. And, I would ask about your Dad as well: that he is physically incapacitated but still has cognition. Otherwise you (or someone) will need to pursue guardianship for them, and this can be very expensive and time-consuming. Also in my experience: without being their active financial PoA or guardian you will have a difficult time when it comes to managing their banking, finances, investments and real estate transactions.
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Marshab Jun 11, 2025
Yes it says she has vascular dementia and alzhtimers in her records. Now they labeled her as incompetent. Said they talked to us about it but they didn't. I got a letter in the mail. They appointed me medical power of attorney . Thank you I will check into that
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