Can I transfer money to an account in my name only so I can budget it for my sister?

Look into setting up a trust - with you as the trustee.

I will also add, once a hoarder, she will continue to hoard unless she gets professional help for this mental disorder. Spending is another symptom. Get her help before all her money is spent.

She sounds incompetent. Seek Guardianship, because a POA only enables you to carry out her wishes. AND as a guardian you can never have a joint account, NOR can you put it in your name; the money must be kept in a separate account in the Ward's name only. That's the law.

Sale of a house should involve a considerable amount of money, I would not think it was wise to simply put it into the bank. Why don't you look into some kind of term investment that will pay a higher return for her money and also shield it from casual overspending?

Would it be possible to get the checkbook away from her? Charge cards? If you juggle accounts around she and the kids might lawyer up on you.

I'm POA for my folks and take care of all the bills. Dad has dementia, thinks moms paying bills, mom knows I'm doing it and she's fine.

Dad has one charge card for the drug store and groceries but I might have to end that as he's beginning to give money to crap charities over the phone.

Sometimes you just have to do what has to be done. Chose your battles and take the path of least resistance. I get by with fibbing a little also.

I wish I could suggest something "wise." Perhaps you could convince her to set up an account that requires both your signature and hers for checks to be valid.

Grace + Peace,
Bob

Consider setting up a budget with her -- where some money then is paid as "room & board" to daughter; mom gets a spending allowance for herself, gifts, etc. Go over it with her every month or more often if you notice charges on a charge account.

Remind her she will be broke and remind daughter or others who are getting money from mom - that in 2yrs, 3yrs whatever at rate she is going -- all assets will be gone and you are not going to bail her out. Discuss realistic care costs for in-home care X hours a week or if mom goes into residential care "$4000+/month. That should be a wake up call. Ask daughter "if mom runs out of money, are you still willing to house and care for her?" Remind mom, daughter that you and others will not be pitching in to make ends meet and a budget and conservative spending is expected and necessary for the sake of all involved.

Good luck. Doubt it will make a difference -- but at least you can feel better about having done due diligence. It can all go very quick at $4000/mo and once you go to NH -- that can escalate to $10K/month or more and drain estate completely.

I strongly agree that if she's in her right mind there's not much you can do. If she is in her right mind, you may have to stay out of it if you can't convince her. However, if she's mentally declining, that's where you'll definitely need guardianship as mentioned here. Guardianship will give you far more power and authority than just POA. POA has a limited amount of privileges, but with guardianship you have it all. It's kind of like living another person's life for them. Besides living your own life and making your own decisions, you get to also live another person's life by making their own decisions like you would for a child. Before taking on the guardianship roll, remember it's a huge responsibility and your life is not completely your own anymore. This may burn you out as the candle starts burning at both ends. You should also review your self and do some very serious soul-searching to see if you're even equipped for this type of responsibility because not everyone is cut out for this type of huge responsibility. Many may volunteer, but not everyone is cut out for it, and somehow the system is uniquely designed to weed out those who are not cut out for it, at least to a point

As aging myself said, you can take the money out in a joint account, because it is also in your name. When my mother started with dementia, the bank personnel warned us against the joint account, because if she would have liability it would transfer to the other person's name on the acct.

Original poster here - First, thanks to everyone for the great advice, I'm still in a quandary but much better informed. The money my sister has will only last 4-5 years assuming she and the kids don't touch it. She's already spend $6k in the last 2 months and I just had to pay $2k this morning to IRS (and still have old Federal taxes to deal with). I know this is hers to squander but I'm on the hook when it's gone and being retired I do not know if I can. I almost think it's elder abuse to *not* manage her finances but I do understand the legal issue until she's declared incompetent. I really appreciate all the input.