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My Mother is 81 and can have a conversation with you if she can hear you, but she soon forgets the conversation. She was recently in the hospital and the nurses suggested something called "sundowners" or something like that saying she answered their questions correctly at the beginning of the day, but not at the end, when she was tired.


I now am trying to do a lot of things at once - get her caregivers through her long term health insurance and I'm trying to get power of attorney.


Her long term care health insurance wants an evaluation about her cognitive impairment to start the claim, that will pay for her caregivers. That appointment is next week.


In 2 weeks I have made an appointment with an elder care lawyer to get power of attorney, who said part of the process is having my mom meet with him alone to make sure this is really what she wants wants, and she's not being forced into it. She can answer a lot of general questions, but sometimes she replies that she doesn't remember.


My question is, if there is an cognitive evaluation done on my Mom next week that states she has some cognitive impairment, and then my meeting with my lawyer is in two weeks, will the results of the evaluation make it more difficult to get the power of attorney? She might be able to answer all the lawyers questions, I just don't know.


I am the only child who lives 2 hours away from my mom who lives by herself. I'm worried she's not taking care of herself or her house and want to get her caregivers ASAP. But I was also told Power of Attorney is so important to have - I really believe she trusts me and she told me she wants to start the process. She had already put my name on all her bank accounts, but not on her bills. She already has a will.


If Mom can't answer a few of the lawyers questions, will the process be a lot harder? Do I go ahead with the dr evaluation next week or put it off until after the lawyer appointment?


My head is spinning!


Missy

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If the cognitive exam comes back negative then your next step is to seek conservatorship which the elder attorney can do for you. This can be paid off with her funds. Stay positive
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Missyjroy, set up the appointment with the Elder Law Attorney early in the morning when you know Mom is thinking her best. The Attorney will decide if he/she thinks your Mom is able to understand a Power of Attorney. POA's aren't that complicated. Will you have a secondary POA if for some reason you cannot preform your duty as Mom's POA?  If not, have Mom pick a second person and have that person go to the Attorney's office with you as their signature would be needed.

When my parents updated their Wills and POA, they both probably had mild dementia but were never tested. My parents did quit well at the meeting and thankfully everything was updated to current State laws. Whew !! Dad dragged his feet on a doing a Trust, and a year later after my Mom had passed, I took him back to get the Trust put together. Since the Elder Law Attorney had her notes from a year ago, she was still able to put together a Trust.

As for Mom's bills, since your name is on her checking account you can sign the checks for the bills. What I did, I had all the bills forwarded to my home address. I had to do that because my Dad was thinking the bills were junk mail... oops.
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