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I take care of my mother, who has dementia and need financial help. I am no long working and need help caring for her. Do anyone know if this is true?

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If she needs financial help, get in touch with your county social services department, they could be helpful in her application for Medicaid, and within that process, you may discover if your state has an in-home caregiver programme that MAY cover reimbursement for your services. But it all depends, check with the county.
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Hello assandache7. I agree. I'm taking care of my mother the best I can. She doesn't have a lot of money. She has social security, and a small pension. If she was in assisted living full time, she would be completely out of money in a little over a year. (We have applied for VA Aide and Attendance, in November-they recently sent their request for one more piece of information, and we got that sent back in). I'm an only child, so I'm lucky in the aspect that I don't have siblings to argue with. (I loved being an only child while I was growing up, and still do :)). We had only planned on keeping my mom for a few months after a shoulder surgery. She seemed to go downhill after that. There was no way she could live by herself. My youngest daughter had just moved out...my hubby and I were only alone for a couple of weeks,..and here comes my mom!!! (I joked back then.."It's a girl". She has been forgetful for some time, but has only recently been diagnosed with dementia about 2 months ago. (Stage 2)...so we aren't in it deep yet. Mom still takes herself to the bathroom, and can feed herself, if someone else makes it. She isn't sleeping regularly, but doesn't bother us too much. We had the room for her..she has her own TV room, her own bedroom, and bathroom at one end of the house. As far as the effects on our immediately family...I agree that we don't always know what we are taking on. I notice that I don't spend as much time with my 2 grandchildren with mom here..they are 1 and 4. I used to keep the 4 year old a couple of times a week when she was younger. I just seem to take it day by day. We do use respite care to help keep me sane. My mother actually leaves next Saturday, on the 15th...for 2 weeks!!!! I'm counting down the days. I'm going to spend some time with those grandbabies. I already have reservations at the Bippity Bobbity Boutique in Downtown Disney, with dinner at the Rain Forest Cafe. Mom usually goes for 1 week per month...but I NEEDED 2..the last few weeks have been full of cataract surgeries, pain management specialists, and the gastroenterologist. We have a Dr's appointment this Wednesday..and a follow up with the eye Dr. on Friday....COME ON SATURDAY!!!!.. I agree that we have no idea what we are getting ourselves into. I thought moving my mom in would be so nice...that we would be looking at old photo albums and taking frequent walks down Memory Lane...Oh well...day by day!!! As far as being her POA...I feel like I have the majority of her paperwork under control. After my dad died in 2012..it was a paperwork nightmare...they hadn't prepared for anything. I picked up the pieces and continue to do so. Luckily, my husband says that his parents won't be staying here. This is the only time in our lives that we will be doing this with a parent. Good Luck to you..and to everyone else on here that is trying to make sense of everything and do everything right.
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BrendaLynn I just love it how we are clueless when POA's are written about these clauses that give us no compensation for what we do by having our ageing parents live with us.. All we want at the time is to take care of them and make sure they are safe.. We are not aware of dementia and it's effects on our immediate family and household...

I don't know about you but I have absentee siblings who I have no intention of worry about their inheritance..
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Hi again, I probably could have been compensated for POA duties. Mine was written in the addendum area that I would not receive any monies for that duty. This was probably done since mom lives with me, and we didn't want to end up with a "conflict of interest" for any reason. I'm sure everyone's situation is different and even with help, it is hard to plan for the future.
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I'm in Colorado and the POA states they can pay themselves for the POA services a reasonable and customary amount.
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Hi there, I'm the POA for my mother, and it states in there that I do NOT receive compensation for that service. It also states under Successor Agent "If any Agent named by me shall die....etc...", it was written in there, "Agent not to gain compensation". I'm in Florida, I'm not sure how other states handle it. On the other hand, my mother lives with me. She pays her own bills and contributes to some of the utilities. Her money was set up to avoid probate after her passing..BUT..you must always anticipate that Medicaid could be involved one day. Always keep receipts!!!
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I see whats gonna happen.About time I learn all the secrets people don't want me to know I'll be ban from this site from knowing to much.I was a seller on eBay for many yrs and talked to many people on seller's central.Everytime you had a question about eBay.The only people you get answering the questions is eBay defenders.Never giving a blunt answer.Always some kind of code talk.About time you learn their code talk eBay banned you from the site because,you learned too much lol.EBay's thought we better ban him or he will speak the truth about whats going on.Just venting the truth is all.
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I hear of other POA/Caregivers getting paid.Under the table it is I must say.I heard of one lady on this site writes checks to her 1-2 yr old grandchildren as gifts and takes her children to the bank to cash the checks so she can get paid.Sounds very crooked to me I must say.But,I see now how it's done.The lady said her grandchildren love and enjoy signing their own names as indorsing checks they make a day of it lol.
I see,
If I as DPOA want's to be paid for my caregiver services I do.All I have to do is make a check out to my child for a amount and have that child cash it for me.Humm the secrets people don't want to tell ya.Crazy it is I must say.POA requires a caregiver to be a crook in order to be paid unfair it is I must say.Any other secrets people?
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I was told by my bank that I as a DPOA can write a check.I must sign like this,
John Doe for Jane Doe as POA.
I take care of my 88 yr old Aunt.I'm her DPOA as well as her caregiver.When my Aunt needs spending money and doesn't feeling up to getting out.She writes a check out for Cash for a example $300.00.I then take that check to her bank and indorse the check as example,John Doe for Jane Doe as POA.I also,make sure I write in the memo what the check is for.My Aunt writes all the checks out her self with her signature writing.Sometimes I forget to have her indorse the checks.When that happens I indorse it as POA with memo to cover my butt.
Sometimes my Aunt want's to give me money with a check.Or sometimes I pay for her prescriptions and she reinburses me later by a check.But,I don't have her make the check out to me.Because,I'm her DPOA.I tell her to make the check out to my wife.My wife isn't POA over funds.Only I.My wife is only POA over Healthcare not for funds.I am DPOA and POA .DPOA is for finances and POA is for health care.
I want to be paid for my services for caregiving for my Aunt.By agreeing to this POA at the start I was never told that I must be my Aunt's caregiver for free.The attorney never told me this.But,I didn't know that I needed to ask.The questions you never think of till it's too late I guess.
My thinking is,
since my wife isn't DPOA for finances and I am.I should be able to hire my wife to be my Aunt's caregiver and use my Aunt's funds to pay my wife for her services she does for my Aunt.I've been fighting the same question this Op has posted here for months without a answer.There is no other family member to appoint POA to but me.I'm the feller stuck doing this for free?
People get POA service confused with caregiver services.They are not the same service.POAs are not allowed to charge for "POA" services.
My DPOA does not state I can not charge for Caregiver services.I am POA over health care & finances for my Aunt.I'm with this OP.We should be able to be paid for caregiver services.Any real answer please?
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As POA you could probably hire a geriatric care manager that would assess their need, then develop a care agreement for you. This could also be done by parents attorney. But, rules vary depending on what state you are in. The POA document itself may have instructions in it as to what is allowed.
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A POA cannot use their authority to write a check to themselves. It would be a Conflict of Interest in any state. POA's are supposed to sign for things in accordance with the patients needs. So make someone else in the family the POA so you can get paid.
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This is a good question. I wish I knew the answer. I have Medical POA, but nobody's paying me to take my parents to all their doctor appointments or anything like that.
but for the original question, I think you need to check with your State.
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I wonder if it varies state to state - I have heard both that you can't, and that you can if you document really, really well; I have heard of people charging small, reasonable amounts even for managing finances and general POA duties. I'll be curious to see if we can get any "Expert" answers on this!
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