Ours is a sad story like so many others. My in-laws were horribly abused by one of my wife's siblings. My father-in-law, who had his faculties, finally changed his POA to us last year and we took over their care. At least we were able to give him a descent last nine months and a real funeral service...unlike what would have happened.
Meanwhile, my wife's sibling took pretty large chunks of money from their parents including approximately $30,000 in cash after refinancing the reverse mortgage to take out more equity.
As this all happened within the last five years, we have been advised that in order to obtain Medicaid, we have to show that any large withdrawl over $1,000 was not a gift but theft, requiring criminal charges or a civil suit at a minimum. In fact, when I approached the local Medicaid office late late week, I was told to come back wtih a criminal complaint and a filed out application.
We really don't want to prosecute my wife's sibling. While this person has been down a bad path, we really don't want the stress or knowledge that we sent a loved one to jail.
We've heard from a bystander that we cannot be forced to prosecute a family member. All of us live in NJ. Can we be forced to take this drastic step?