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OK, will try and keep this short as much as possible..

As many, we all have problems with dealing with emotional problems concerning with caring for a parent.. mine is complicated and have a controlling alfa mother who still see's me as a minor at 42..

She has ailments and memory problems.... and she daily causes upset with many issues that make me feel very emotionally tired and drained..

I was thinking of telling her how I really feel... telling her I love her so much, I want the best for her, but she tries me so much, she may may or may not know she's doing it but she does push the smallest issues like it's a life or death situation beyond the ridiculous... hurting me, her and my husband to the edge.. all round very depressing..

She recently came into a bit of money.. about £20K English not sure how much that is in US Money... she was happy about it at first... but then soon got back to being depressed.... she is happy at the moment because she has just purchased a disabilaty footpath/sidewalk motor chair.. and talking to her in the last 2 days has been great... no negativity... I told her I love her new attitude and hearing her talking about things she's done since having it.... and taking flowers to my dad's grave today.....

she's been very mean to me for many years now and this is rare as rare can be her being like this...

My 3 half brothers hate her... I can't tell her all I know, as she will take it badly... I have nothing to do with them, but the middle brother who is the family "S*it" stirrer has taken interest lately due to my youngest brother's trouble and due to go into prison soon as he is mentally instable as are all 3 of them are to be honest...

What I would like to say to her is.. I LOVE YOU MUM, but please don't take all your negativity out on me.. I'm here to help you.... and just bring up how she is with me and to please stop hurting me all the time....

Please help.. advice welcome... x

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Lone, it's so hard to care for someone who doesn't appreciate us! Yes, go see a therapist! There's a thread somewhere here about how caring for a parent who has been abusive or even just not too caring in the past puts the carer at risk for depression and worse. Get yourself some help and always remember that it's the SANE members of the family who go for therapy.
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I always said that if my dad would take the Prozac, I wouldn't have to.
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Pamstegman: thank you so much for your comment and I know exactly what you mean, I have thought of this and I know if I start this, it could open a whole can of worms.. my 3 half bothers have talked of abuse by my mother and my dad, dad being my full dad but not their actual father... (brothers by mum's first marriage).... just whenever they show any kind of care she sometimes softens to them.. but they hate her.... and it all starts over again.... ty so much and I think it's time for me to get some professional help... I know mum has been offered anti depressants, but she's not interested.
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There is a fine line between being honest and being vindictive. Just tell her you love her and get her/you some antidepressants. Bringing up past hurts will not work and spiral the depression downward. Ask any counselor about it.
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