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Chloesgrams2012, I think the smell of pee is imbedded in my nose as well! Dad pees into an old Rubbermaid pitcher during the night and when I open the door to his bedroom in the morning to empty it, I gag. After I empty and wash it I can still smell the pee. I don't know why my mom throws her used tp in the trash. I feel like I am constantly spraying room deodorizer and I still cannot get the smell out! I know what you mean about not wanting people to come over. Can't wait for it to warm up so I can open the windows!
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Try looking into a bidet seat, which can drastically reduce or even eliminate the need for paper and is overall much more hygienic. Brondell in San Francisco makes a full line of bidet products, from fancy electronic seats to simple non-electric bidet attachments and sprayers. Good luck!
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I pray they don't start stuffing their incontinence things in the commode. I have been there and done that and it is NOT fun. I've had a stuffed up commode and an overflowing one that ruined the bathroom and the bedroom carpet. I managed to fish the Depends out the different times she has done it, thank heavens........Then all of a sudden she quits doing it. I'm thinking why did she do it all those times, why did you suddenly quit?? She puts her dirty toilet paper in her diaper pail and she does not understand to flush it. Once in a blue moon she does! It's just easier to pee in the Depends and she knows she is doing it, too. I watch her and so does my husband. Then she looks just as guilty as can be. I'm thinking some of hers may be just being spiteful.......It sure is doing a number on me and trying to keep her from stinking is beyond control. How do you get the "funky" bathroom and pee smell out of your house. I don't even want anyone to come to my house, ever. I know if I smell it, they would have to. Cleaning doesn't help the aroma, unless it is embedded in my nose. When I mention about the smell or a bath or her Depends being wet or the toilet paper, she looks so hurt, like I have cursed her or something and that I would never do. I am just really puzzled!!
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Mom: "hey why did you throw that napkin away"? " It's still clean I only used it once"
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This sure must be a common thing. Grandma collected her tissues, napkins, anything paper and filled drawers with it. A neighbor I cared for used a tissue a minute to wipe a non-existent runny nose. But Mom was the grand master at running through the toilet tissue! A roll at a time unless we stopped it. I can't tell you how many toilets we have had to unstick.

It is natural to wonder WHY? With all three, it seemed a different reason. Grandma just seemed to need something to collect to help her feel secure. Neighbor just needed something in her hands. Mom, the one with Alzheimers, I pondered long and hard about. I concluded that the paper in the bathroom usage had much to do with the state of Mom's consciousness. Her world was reduced to the moment, to the immediate. I theorized that when Mom went to the bathroom, she would forget that she had already wiped, so she did it again...and again...and again.

We also removed all tissue from the bathrooms, setting a roll in a closed cabinet nearby for family members, but only a few sheets doled out to Mom whenever she had to go. This worked well, but it required that one of us be almost constantly available to Mom to do so.

I too, welcomed the incontinence when it finally arrived. Little did I know that changing would then become a terrible bone of contention between Mom and me. So, be careful what you wish for. You may just get it.

The toilet tissue phase lasted a good four or five years in our family. We all had to get used to the routine of handing Mom some tissue on the way to the bathroom, or bringing some to her if she got there before we did. In the end, one of us had to always accompany her for she forgot where the bathroom was and once there, sometimes forget what was supposed to be done there. BM in the late stages became the same problem and often feces went on the floor instead of in the toilet.

Not everyone goes through all of these stages of course, but maybe hearing about it and how common it is will help someone else. I don't know why we have to try to find a reason for everything, but that is how we are hooked up. I just always tried to imagine how it would be if I could not remember anything from one moment to the next.

I sure wish I had found this forum long ago. Keep up all the good work, posters. WE need each other!
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Gosh they are like children again. My grandson was in the bathroom quite a while so I checked on him. He was rolling and rolling the tp. Luckily, there was nothing too gross in the toilet so I grabbed all the stuff and chucked it in the wastebasket. The toilet was about to overflow. Sort of like Glen Campbell drinking dishwashing liquid and trying to eat superglue (in People Mag). For a child you can childproof your home but if you put the stuff up high the adult can reach it. Guess you have to lock it up or do what Glen's family finally did-- put him in a home:-( My husband has not reached the incontinence stage yet. I feel for you and do not look forward to it. I saw an ad for Liberty diapers that are supposed to be covered my medicare.
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My husband puts his dirty tp in the wastebasket. I removed the wastebasket and he put them on the vanity counter so I put the bin back. I just remove them and throw them in the toilet or my bathroom smells like a horse barn. It could be worse... I told him to throw them in the toilet-- that is why they call it "toilet paper" but with the memory loss... All the plumbing issues sound worse. Please do not put anything down your toilet except tp if you can help it. I am down the street from a manhole and the county did not do maintenance on the sewer pipes. I had sewage coming into my luckily unfinished basement. Afterward, the county did lots of work on the pipes but they claimed they really did not know who was at fault. You cannot fight city hall as they say.
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My dad loves stashing food away in tissue paper. hides it in drawers, cupboards, under the bed, under the blankets or even lies on it. Everything get wrapped in tissue paper. He also goes through a roll of toilet paper in a day. He loves his trips to the bathroom. sometimes its normal and often its in and out. I wonder if he forgets that he had just been. Never sure. But we leave him. Not much we can do.
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Our sewer department was on the news. last month complaining about the wet wipes. They said that using 2-3 at a time was causing the sewer department lots of problems.
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I think we are all sharing the same situation. It is 11:00 PM and my Mom is setting in her chair playing with kleenex's and folding and refolding and I am so ready for bed. Last night she was doing the same thing and I had to get up extremely early to get my husband off to work, so I just told her, "Mom, we are going to bed, are you?" She looked at me and said "Now?" Then she piddled and diddled and doddled getting ready for bed and I was ready to pull my hair out. ..........I mean why not got to bed, instead of setting there folding and refolding kleenex, so everyone has to set up and be miserable?! She gets mad if I suggest bed or acts like I am punishing her. It is getting ridiculous!!.........I know she is setting in a Depends that has to be totally full of pee, because I have NOT seen her go to the bathroom all day and her diaper pail only has used toilet paper in it. She too puts her mess in there instead of flushing it. Does anyone have a clue why they do this? I am at wit's end and don't know what to do, each day is worse. Please help talk me through this. I am at wit's end!!
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I'm glad to see that this is not just going on in my house! My mom goes through an entire roll of toilet paper a day and I really don't know how she does it. Then she puts the extra roll up on the shelf over the toilet so that if you run out, you can't reach it. Or she puts her used toilet paper in the trash rather than flushing it! My dad has issues with paper towels. He only wants to wipe (after a BM) with paper towels and he puts them in the trash too!
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Thank you Patti 99, I am not alone .
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My mother has been tearing paper towels in four pieces and putting them in ziplocks and stashing them all over her room. She also saves used napkins. When looking for something in her room I came across gallon baggies full of folded paper towels and napkins, when I asked her why she had them she said she needed them to wipe her nose. She also has no cold or sinus problems , when I pushed the issue a little more she said she used them to clean her glassed and then finally admitted she didn't know why she saved them.
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Oh yes!!! My husband has FTD and age 58. Symptoms started early last yr and the TP and Kleenex fixation started mid last yr. I keep Kleenex in one room instead of near where he usually is as he went through a box of kleenex in a day or 2 at the most. Looked hardly used. He does this in restaurants also. TP has been going fast too so will just take some of these tips and not keep some stored in the bathrooms. I am glad that I am not alone on this. I feel like I am not a good caregiver, I get so frustrated. He watches the same DVD's all the time too. Have to just set out a few cookies in the dish too as he ate 1/2 container of Trader Joes cookies in a few hrs. one day.
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How timely! After having the toilet snaked twice in two weeks and then replacing it on the third week, my husband & I were beside ourselves! We brought Dad (now96) to live with us a year ago, after his second subdural hematoma in 2 months...in assisted living...he refused to ask for any kind of help....he uses toilet paper so unbelievably quickly!! The extra giant roll lasts about 2 days...flush able wipes get used 3-4 at a time...and in puts mini-pads in his underwear 'in case of' fecal leaking...he uses tissues at nite after he uses the urinal....we have finally told him just to NOT flush, and we'll take care of it...then we don gloves and scoop out tennis ball size amounts of wet paper products to dispose elsewhere....I'm liking the lidded bucket idea!..
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I too have a LO with bathroom tissue and paper napkin issues, but in the opposite direction! He tears each paper napkin in 1/4's and uses them to blow his nose at he dining table, even with a box of tissues sitting next to his chair. He is being economical . I wish he used more tissues in the bathroom, one thin square, no matter what.
I totally agree with having to check all his pockets before doing the laundry or I will have a blizzard of white paper. I think as the youngest of 10 growing up right after the depression, his behavior is understandable. I try to pick up any scrap that he leaves for later and may need to buy him some "special", thicker toilet tissue. I do have moist flushable wipes for him, but he rarely uses them.
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My Mom is in assisted living, so she has her own bed and bath. She's 95 and is going down the slippery slope. She is able to walk uptown, a block away, to the store and buys a bag of tissue paper. She brings the boxes back and places them through the facility. The aides feel bad that she's spending her money, but I say if that's the least of my worries, I'm ok with it.
In her room, however, she cuts open the boxes of tissues and stacks the tissue in various places around her room and bathroom. While I think it's unsanitary, again, I have other things to worry about. It does make be a little crazy.
The issue that makes me really crazy is the refusing to put the toilet paper, used, in the toilet. She insists on putting it in the waste basket. I think this goes back to living in a house with septic.
Thanks for letting me share with others who can relate. :)
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My Mom is in assisted living, so she has her own bed and bath. She's 95 and is going down the slippery slope. She is able to walk uptown, a block away, to the store and buys a bag of tissue paper. She brings the boxes back and places them through the facility. The aides feel bad that she's spending her money, but I say if that's the least of my worries, I'm ok with it.
In her room, however, she cuts open the boxes of tissues and stacks the tissue in various places around her room and bathroom. While I think it's unsanitary, again, I have other things to worry about. It does make be a little crazy.
The issue that makes me really crazy is the refusing to put the toilet paper, used, in the toilet. She insists on putting it in the waste basket. I think this goes back to living in a house with septic.
Thanks for letting me share with others who can relate. :)
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We had the same problem with my MIL. We have septic and we thought she would clog it up in no time.We switched her to Scott brand toilet paper which seem to last longest and it's thin. I believe it's the pulling it off the roll that is the draw for her. Also, tissues and napkins: Napkins for meal times she would use up to ten or more at one sitting. We bought a restaurant napkin holder, this slowed her down for a short time. Soon we had to dole out napkins for her because she was like a chain smoker but with napkins, continually taking one after she crumbled up the other one . Tissues...we had gone through so many boxes of tissue, that we started buying it by the case. The cheaper the better. We moved her tissues where she would have to get up to get one. That slowed her down on them too. She was just squirreling them away in her pockets. So for us, we have curbed her paper using but I believe we won't prevent this behavior, maybe slow her down for a while.
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I am so glad to be a part of this site as it reminds me that I'm okay. My mother, too, has an obsession with tissue. In pockets of her sweater, purse, and she actually takes all of the tissues out of box and refolds them. I've figured out it's comfort for her. It also keeps me a little more at peace as watching her always in confusion keeps me upset. I figured spending a few dollars for xtra boxes is a small thing to keep her nerves in check. It's just the opposite, however, with tp as she doesn't want to waste. I just check her places after putting her to bed to clean out used tissues.
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Drives me nuts, mom's Kleenex thing especially, since I now use old fashioned hankies I can wash myself (I've offered her a clean one daily which she laughs at). Every time I hit the bathroom, I need to shake out the rugs what with all the tiny pieces of Kleenex or toilet paper everywhere. There's usually a trail all around the house. The sinus thing you mention is interesting, never thought maybe some of her meds could add to this. She's always had seasonal allergies anyway so I guess the nose dripping is nothing new.
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i find that the reason my mom uses so many tissues is she is trying to clean "whatever", and SHE CAN'T SEE IF ITS CLEAN!!! she has macular degeneration,which is like a huge black cloud in the middle of her eye.......also, i realize the reason she wants to save every bit of tissue to use again, is because she grew up during the depression....and they did'nt have much....most of these old folks were taught to save everything from aluminun foil to reuse to tissue paper.....think about it, it makes sense.....
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OMG oodness.... lol My grandpa uses a lot of Kleenex. But, frugal with the toilet tissue. He has sinus problems but, has Kleenex is stashed everywhere. When I go to wash I got to go through everything to make sure it don't land in the washer. Talk about a mess. He then wants to reuse the toilet tissue for his penis. Thank God he let's me use wet wipes on his bottom now. He has a habit of putting lotion on his toilet paper to wipe his own bottom. God forbid you get cheap tissue...... or forget his baby lotion..... Gotta Love him !!!! LOL
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Thank you for the hug 12wondering. You are hugged right back :)

Something else my dad does is that he now no longer sit up straight at the table. He leans back in his chair and wants to bring the food on this long road :) all the way to his mouth from the table. Naturally he drops some of it on his clothes and its yet another thing one has to deal with. Its all so strange seeing him do this though. when I was growing up he was quite strict on table manners, so its almost funny now.

Shame yesterday, he showered in the morning because my sister told him to and it used to be a bit of a mission, now its become a little easier , I mean a little, but when she got home late afternoon, she noticed him wearing the same clothes/pajamas, which has become his day-wear and she told him again to shower. She was told this morning by the help that he did shower in the morning and she felt quite bad about getting him to shower again after he had told her that he did. That's when one feels bad and yet most of the time it can be quite taxing. ooh!
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I am an HHA for clients with Dementia/AD. I have notice many times clients will overuse toilet paper, even paper towels in an effort to clean up after bowel movements. What I started doing was coaching them in the use of flushable wet wipes. This is because I realized often the fecal matter was dried, probably from a BM earlier in the day when they were alone. Thus I closely supervise and coach them in the use of a wet wipe in order to get clean without using tons of toilet paper.
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How about finding out what causes this problem. There must be something they are trying to say or are thinking about. My daughter is an expert in Dementia and altimerzes. Her name is Denise
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yes i can totally relate to the paper product issue. My mom counts the sheets of paper and sometimes doesn't take enough and then constantly wants to put it in the waste basket instead of toilet. Somehow though we do go through a lot of TP
The other is napkins I go thru a pile at dinner just like eating with a child I have to wipe her hands and pick food off her clothes. I also have to take her plate away as soon as she is finished because it bugs her and she doesn't know what to do with it. She insists on wiping her plate yet more napkins.
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OH MY, it's the same here! Paper of all kinds is stuffed everywhere. I am just not too excited about "snotty" papers on my countertop and grocery bags in the kitchen. I try to grab them before the washer does. I have ruined so many loads of clothes. Prayers to everyone dealing with this. I guess it could be worse, especially the "used" kind!
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Mom puts them in her pockets, purse, and bra. We have folded bits of TP (clean thankfully), paper towels and tissues in numerous piles/places - she is like a squirrel.
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Conversing with a LO who has Alzheimer's is often like talking with your cat. Acknowledge, respond, be affectionate, develop boundless patience. Forget about rational responses. Show respect, your therapeutic fictional responses are allowed. ~DLMifm

try to accept the mind is damaged. Forget about rational responses. we can run ourselves ragged trying to rationalize the irrational behaviors
Easy to say, impossible to live with .."Take a BREAK often | You get to start o
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