Tipping a Home Health Aide?

If there's any situation where the "don't ask/don't tell" theory applies, it's here.

Our home health aide was a true angel who always performed above and beyond, for a mere pittance - she didn't even make half of the hourly rate we paid the agency. With three children to support, she greatly appreciated the gift cards for the local chain supermarket that I gave her on holidays and her birthday.

The agency doesn't need to know diddly.

I worked for a large CG company. They charged the client over $25 an hour. I made $9 an hour. You do the math.

After a YEAR, I asked for a raise. I was turned down. The 'policy' was 'no raises, ever, you make what you make'.

I had to quit, since there was no hope of ever 'doing better'--and told my client's family so. They were devastated, as I was the first and only CG who could handle their mom, whom I had grown to love. I wasn't trying to shake them down, I had to give them a reason for my leaving for a $12 an hour job. (I was working both jobs and could go FT at the $12 an hour one).

I don't know how it happened, but the family (wealthy, to say the least) worked it out with my company to 'tip me out' so that my pay went to $14 an hour, after tax. 2 of the sons were lawyers and I am sure involved in this.

My 'boss' said she'd never seen this before--and I do not know how they worked it out, but I was happy to stay, and honestly, it is often only through being paid that you feel worthwhile. It's about the hardest job in the world!!

My client would also 'tip me' at Christmas and on my birthday. A crisp $100 bill, which was most appreciated. I did not tell my company, and I never felt bad about NOT telling them. Always a sweet note accompanied these gifts.

I stayed with this client until she had to be placed in independent living. Broke our hearts, both of us.

And I quit working for the 'big, cheap company'. Who by then were charging $30 an hour and STILL only paying $9 an hour. And couldn't figure out why their employees were leaving after only a few months.

CG is the hardest job out there, IMHO. A baked good and a card? I honestly would rather have nothing. I was making it possible for an elderly woman to spend 2 more years at home--a loaf of banana bread wouldn't make up for that.

I would give them a card with a VISA that has whatever amount you think that you would like to give and not tell the agency. It's none of their business and they don't deserve any portion of the thank you that the caregiver receives. (You can get these VISA cards at any bank)

I gave my dad’s helper gift cards, and though he’s gone now, I still send her gift cards on occasion. A wonderful helper is a godsend

Most agencies do not permit caregivers to accept gifts, if they do the value is typically limited to $25.00.
A gift card is a good choice.
Often you can purchase gift cards at Sam's Club or Costco for less than the face value. (typically a $100 pack of 4 cards, $25.00 each will cost around $80.00) these are great for gifts. And you do not have to pay to activate them Some of the Visa and Mastercard cards you have to pay a fee to activate them.
One thing your caregiver would greatly appreciate would be a letter written to the agency and a copy to your caregiver telling how grateful you are for the help and care that this person is providing. You can give detailed information as to what they have done. This will go in the employee file and the copy you give to the employee might be able to be used if they wish to look for another job, or if they are asking for a raise.

Be like the Military: Don't ask and don't tell !! I am sure the Aide wants the tip and as long as she keeps your generosity to herself, only the two of you will know this secret :-)

Considering the fact anytime you employ a person to care for your loved one they’re providing the most important thing I join in with the recommendation of most here to go ahead and dismiss the agency’s rule not to give a gift to the cg, it’s a predatory unethical practice by the agency in the first place telling adults they can’t thank the caregiver!! so definitely I would gift them with either cash or a Visa gift card confidential between you and the caregiver

I feel if you find a good Aide, a little extra $$ won’t hurt anyone as long as she keeps it to herself. Any way you can get someone to stay so a parent who is, for example, combative doesn’t have a different Aide every day. My private pay Aide I got from an agency...who neglected to pay her for a long time. Even though I prepaid the agency a couple of thousand $$$ !!!
So she works for me for 3 + years. Good luck & hugs 🤗

No one can tell you that you can't give a Christmas gift to a friend. :)

It sound to me like she has become more than a Home Health Aide to your family. You may have met her because of the agency, but she has now become a friend to your family.

Tips and gifts are discouraged by agencies. They worry that home health care aides may "prey" on their clients, especially those with cognitive impairment. However, home health care aides usually make only minimum wage. So, make sure to have food and drinks the aide can eat/drink whenever they are there. If you do want to "gift," consider practical gifts like gift cards to Walmart and grocery stores. Gift cards to expensive restaurants will probably never get used.