I hope everyone is have a great week :)
I have wrote here before under similar names, but cannot retrieve my logins correctly so here it goes...
My boyfriend and I have been his grandmothers primary caretakers pretty much the entire duration of our relationship (2.5 years.) After several falls, declining in her breathing (smoker has COPD, asthma the whole 9 yards) she refuses to go to a nursing home. She was having aides come in a lot more when she came home from rehab that took a brunt of the weight off of him, and as a result me, but now she has no money and can no longer pay for them to come as frequently.
He lives with her by the way, I did not mention that and now he is her primary caretaker at 30 years old. He has to empty her commode and essentially change her diapers. I told her that I was not doing any of the harder care taker tasks because I wouldn't even do that for my own mother and she's mad that I make him empty the commode...LOL that's not where I am going with this post but wanted to give everyone a good laugh.
I am not belittling anyone who is super hands on with parents or inlaws, I think that is very admirable, just not for me. It's at the point that she needs to go to a nursing home but refuses. There is a part of me that is sickened that he has to take care of her to the extent that he does.
It just blows my mind, I suppose because I come from a family with a lot of pride and wouldn't let anyone do that for them unless a professional.
I am not sure. It just blows my mind that she's okay with her grandson doing all of this and completely burdening his life and refuses to go to a nursing home.
Has anyone else had success on trying to make their elderly parent or grandparent realize that they need more help than you are able to provide?
Thank you in advance!