I am 35, I have a husband, a 7 year old and a 15 year old. I recently quit my job as a dental assistant to take care of my husband's grandparents, who raised him during a bad time in his life. They moved in with us because grandma has dementia. We knew she was slipping but grandpa never understood how much so we didn't either. It's been about 6 months and it is really testing our family. Of course she's getting worse all the time. Grandpa is still in denial about her condition and the extent of it. Today we found that she had defecated on the bedroom floor and later found that she had urinated on the same floor. That was a new low. My husband has no patience with her and is ready for her to go. Problem is grandpa doesn't need to go but wont be without her. They have been together for 67 years, they go together. They are farmers so things at a "home" would be devastating to him. Moving in with us was bad enough for him. We just got a helper one day a week for which grandpa resents. My patience are wearing thin. They have a family farm and another farm they collect rent from for income. Do they have assets that we don't want a nursing home to get. That's not what grandpa worked his whole life for or grandma either. She's up and wanders ask the time. I need advise. I don't know what to do to keep my sanity and keep her safe. I can't use child proof oven things on my oven. I'm going to have to take the handles off of the oven so she stops trying to warm up coffee. She was prescribed a low dose of xanax to help her relax but it doesn't work. Please help. Need advise on lots of issues.