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My wife's dementia seemed to coincide with her son's massive and debilitating stroke. Frequent falls do not deter her drinking and she confidently demands more alcohol when she wakes from a brief nap after each episode. Despite my efforts to get her to the doctor, her confidence deceives him or she cancels the appointments. She is proud to remind me that he told her she was so healthy she would live to be 90; "Come back when you get sick". She forgets what day and year it is, recounts all of her life and love history to as she drinks; can be belligerent screaming "I hate you". Her mother was diagnosed with Manic-Depression and her daughter recounted how she walked on egg shells to avoid her mom's anger. Current medications include Levothyroxine for thyroid (137 MCG), Paxil for anxiety and depression (40 MG) and Trazodone (100 MG) for sleeping.

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I'd say do it now. It's not likely this is going to get better. She is apparently an alcoholic in denial, plus there's a good chance that she may be suffering from a mental illness, as well.

It's not unusual for married couples to have POA for each other. You'd have a lot of rights as a spouse, but much depends on how you've set up your assets. I'd speak with an attorney, soon.
Good luck,
Carol
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Get the DPOA asap. Go to the legal tab on this website and educate yourself on types of POAs, what you need and what they mean. DO NOT ALLOW ANY ATTORNEY to write a "springing" POA -- they are disastrous and ineffective when you need them (unless you are young). You need to get the DPOAs for both of you and have them notarized BEFORE she gets diagnosed with anything officially and it could be challenged. Put someone you trust in charge of your DPOA (not your wife if she has mental health or alcoholic issues). While you're at; have attorney prepare Advanced Medical Directive at the same time. Make sure you keep these in a safe place and provide a copy to your children or trusted person so they can invoke as needed in the future.
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I would say now is the time to get the POA. I’m sorry for the struggle you’re going through with your wife. You’re being very responsible about how to handle the situation though. The only foreseeable problem is getting your wife to sign the POA. I had to do this for my aging mother and it wasn’t hard. You can get the Power of Attorney legal documents online from Rocket Lawyer. The website is self-explanatory and the process is made easy for you. Have this done before her condition worsens and her doctor does deem her as mentally incompetent. You can read about the different types of POAs there
Best of luck to you.
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