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I feel it is dangerous that is how my mom died without consent. This is for the people who don't believe in euthanasia.

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This is a very delicate subject so I will attempt to tread lightly here. Death of a loved one is a horrible experience to go through for anyone. I mean no disrespect to the writers here who feel their loved ones where hurried to the end by meds and medical personnel, but it would be interesting to hear the other side. No doubt this has happened, I'm sure lots of medical folks can get very callous about the end of life, but I feel very strongly We Have To Honestly Appraise The Quality Of Life our love ones have in those last weeks and days. Put yourself in their place. Do you want to go out like that? Is it really that important to squeeze another month, week, day, hour of life out of someone who in most cases has been suffering for a long time. I challenge anyone to walk around a skilled nursing home facility and tell me you want your life extended to the last possible minute and end up stacked up like so much cordwood waiting to die. Sorry. Maybe I didn't tread so lightly. Just trying to be honest.
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Reply to Windyridge
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I think people should be able to decide the timing of their final exit. Much as we execute living wills, we should have the right to execute a more comprehensive document that allowed us the same dignity and compassion we allow our beloved pets.

I also think people need to be educated about the process and become more comfortable with its realitty. Just because we have the medical know-how to extend the life of a 100-year-old does not, by any stretch of the imagination, mean we should.
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Reply to MaggieMarshall
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I agree with Maggie, I think one should have a choice on their final demise. I know if something happens to me and I am in a coma state or rack with terrible pain with no chance of improvement, believe me I want an out... I don't want family to stop their lives to watch me suffer for months if not years. What type of "quality of life" would that be not only for me, but for my loved ones?
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Reply to freqflyer
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Because of modern medicine, gone are the days where many would find their love ones had died from a heart attack while taking a nap on the sofa. That is the way to leave this earth, without any warning. No one had to make any decisions.
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Reply to freqflyer
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Hospice will tell you pointedly that upping the oxygen saturation will stop the body's breathing, and which drugs given too close together will cause cardiac arrest. Although you'd think this was meant to be a caution, their attitude and demeanor clearly shows that it is meant instead to be an "out" for the person, if they want to speed up the dying, or for the family, if they want to speed up their loved one's dying process. Then they get so inured to it, they start to advocate speeding up the process even before "active dying" starts! So make sure before you go into homecare or Hospice, that you have found a doc who will be the primary care physician, and is one you can call for backup against the attitude some nurses have that the best death is drugged up and speeded up.
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Reply to Singingway
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We recently had a murder-suicide in a San Marcos hospital. A retired Methodist bishop shot his wife and then himself in her hospital room. She had received a bad diagnosis, though I'm not sure what it was. It was apparently so painful that they couldn't bear to go through it. He was 87 and she was 85. Some people would be outraged, but I understood the pain that must have gone into such a decision made by a godly man.
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Reply to JessieBelle
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You can copy and paste the link into the address bar and go and vote against assisted suicide in the medical field. I think that if someone really wants to kill themselves then it is up to them but don't get the medical field involved. That should not be their job. That should have nothing to do with them. This will just put patients who want to live in danger and life will not be respected anymore.
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Reply to flowgo
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I used to be totally against euthanasia because I have no trust in the government and practitioners to get it right. A recent ruling of the Supreme Court of Canada that we have a constitutional right to doctor assisted suicide if that is our choice made headlines here and got us all here debating the topic yet again. I think under the circumstances covered by the court I would allow for a person with a terminal illness to chose the time of their death rather than force them to endure months (or years) of suffering. I am still totally against having the decision made on behalf of another person as would be the case in someone not mentally competent. Too often I have heard people say "I would rather be dead than have _______" (fill in the blank with whatever). Who are we to judge if that person finds their life valuable?

As for the nudge/wink solution available now of morphine and ativan to ease the transition for those in their final days, I think if it could be more openly discussed then we could all make more informed choices. I have spent years searching the internet and dealing with the healthcare system and feel I am pretty well informed, yet things still crop up in my mom's care that have me searching for answers yet again. People who have a sudden illness (like stroke for example) often have never been ill before, have no clue how the system works and aren't even aware of their options. Those within the system have become so used to the way things work they often seem to forget how totally ignorant outsiders can be and there is often no effort made to help us understand. THAT is what has to change.
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Reply to cwillie
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I suppose it's not anyone's right to decide who lives or who dies. However, with that said, the last 2 months of my mother's life was horrific. Dying from AZ isn't pretty. If my mother knew what would eventually happen to her, she'd sign to be euthanized in a hot second. Seeing what I have saw with my mother ... if I unfortunately acquire this disease I will have it stipulated somewhere that I be allowed to peacefully go to sleep before the horror starts. JMO
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Reply to JeanetteB
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Flowgo is trying to manage her grief. It's not working. She does not want a rational discussion about mom's death. Her mind is made up. I would venture to say that her family is sick of hearing about it and, while they may be sympathetic, they do not agree with her. She alone sees conspiracy.

Why do I say that? Well, first because I have no patience for it. Old people die. They die unexpectedly sometimes. Rapid decline after major surgery is not unusual. And, while an Angel of Death is not out of the question, a vast conspiracy by staff to kill a little old lady is ludicrous.

We do not have all the facts. She doesn't even want to tell us her mom's age. We don't know what kind of operation she had. And, frankly, any information we get now is suspect since Flow has a narrative in mind and, IMO, cannot be trusted to give us info that doesn't neatly fit within it.

SO! For all of those people who have family on hospice at home, who have loved ones in the hospital on the brink of their final journey, or who are considering calling on hospice, believe this: hospice services are a gift to the dying and a gift to their families. Their medications and analgesics are subject to protocol. The administration of same is carefully monitored. And while there may EVER SO RARELY be a rogue PERSON (not team, not hospital, not conspiracy) the hospice program is staffed with some of the most compassionate people on earth.
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Reply to MaggieMarshall
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