My mother suffers from hearing loss and I believe she is legally blind. She also has some type serious memory issue which I can't say for certain is Dementia. She struggles to follow conversations and can't keep track of time based in formation. She's also very insecure and quite narcissistic. (I know that is a terrible thing to say about one's own mother but its always been true). She demands to make all business decisions but struggles to follow the conversations.
I moved back to my home town to try to be there for her about 7 months ago, giving up my job in engineering management. She has a small business that was being badly mismanaged, so rather than looking for work, I took over the running of her business.
On a day to day basis she has a casual helper; A lovely lady who helps clean, was cloth and helps her run errands.
She also has a live in boyfriend of 15 years or so. They have never married so that she could continue to receive her deceased husband's social security. With her eyesight and hearing, he handles the finances.
Her boyfriend is hoarder. She may have had those tendencies as well but not to same extreme. Its so hard to watch him waste her money though I feel powerless to stop it.
I find myself in the situation where I am working full time. The business is an on call type of service, so it extends into weekends and evenings. Its going quite well but I work alone now. I do not take any payment for my efforts, a decision definitely do not regret. I am working to keep the cash flow going to support my mother but I am also supporting her decision to her resources to be wasted. It is beyond frustrating.
He seems to be feeding her negative ideas almost constantly. He seems to be poisoning the relationship between her and her caregiver. I fear what she will do on a day to day basis if that relationship breaks down completely. At this point she can not clean or care for herself properly on her own but will accept no help from me for her personal care.
There is so much more to this story but this is a good start. I honestly don't know to do to manage this situation any better than I have but I feel like I am loosing ground. I also don't know how long I can practically expect to work full time like this. Any suggestions would be welcome