My mom has Alzheimer's, diagnosed 13 years ago. She has been very slowly declining but more so in the last year. For the first time she didn't seem to recognize me but she is very clever about hiding her dementia. I've read many posts here describing the anguish loved ones feel when they aren't remembered anymore. The loss of the person my mother used to be has been so gradual and until two years ago she and Dad lived hours away so I didn't see them regularly. I've accepted over time that Mom's decline is inevitable, that she will not get better, that she will have some days better than others, and there will come a day when she will go to sleep and not wake up. Here's my dilemma and wondering if others can identify. I think I'm emotionally detached from the day to day sense of loss. I watch my dad (her primary caregiver) silently, patiently, care for her. He grieves the loss of the girl he married and has loved for 67 yrs. He's fearful of the unknowns of the future. I'm remaining rational, practical, and emotionally "even" so I can encourage him through this. I lost my husband after a sudden illness 8 yrs ago. For four long painful years I walked that grief journey wondering if I would ever recover, be myself again, and have passion and energy for life. I finally made up my mind to move out of isolation, live a life of purpose, and feel free to love again. I also determined that I would never again let myself get so emotionally "lost" that I couldn't function reasonably and rationally. I held my brother's hand 10 months ago when he took his last breath after battling cancer for years. I couldn't cry tears of sorrow. I was happy he was free from pain! I miss him and my memories are precious but few tears. Do I have a healthy emotional response to losses and particularly where my mom is now? I would be most grateful if others could share how you've handled the grief of loss. I know everyone grieves differently; the time frame and emotions aren't the same for everyone. I just don't want to shut down.