DH & I were able to get to the hospital by forcing her to clean up. She had been on a personal hygiene strike for about a week now & we couldn't take it anymore. MIL started screaming that we were killing her by bathing her. DH helped me get her into her shower stool. The stool is about 18 " off the floor so when she felt like she was done cleaning she ever so gently slipped off the stool onto the shower floor for her "fainting spell" and that was my chance. I cannot lift her anymore. She outweighs me by 20 plus #s, DH has 5 broken ribs so, I refused to let him even try and I called the rescue squad. She didn't want to go to the ER but I suggested that maybe her uncooperative behavior was a sign that she had hit her head (she did not) but, luckily one of the EMTs wanted to go by the book and said they needed to take her and have a DR. look at her! DH knows I am all but done so, he went to the hospital & was able to convince them to keep her overnight and, we are going to try to get her evaluated tomorrow. I would love to see her go to rehab for a week or so. That is my selfish prayer for tonight. I've been cleaning her room this evening, scrubbing and flipping the mattress, scrubbing the floor and disinfecting everything. Does anyone know of a good resource to find free answers about her Medicare, Humana and short-term care insurance? It's so hard to read all the member books and understand any of it let alone find the answers I need.? Thanks again for your all's help and letting me vent and know I'm not the only one who feels this way. I had no idea there was a whole community of people that were burnt out, used up and didn't recognize themselves anymore. I'm finally not alone anymore.
They will send a social worker to talk to you. This person will make all kinds of promises about infinite homecare services that will come to your house and endless resources if you allown your MIL to go back to your home.
It's one great big lie. If she's lucky they will send a bath aide once or twice a week that insurance will cover.
The hospital will keep her admitted until a bed becomes available in a LTC facility. You will not have to take care of getting her on Medicaid or anything else. The facility the hospital puts her in will do the application.
Good luck and stay strong. Don't let her come back.
Above is a link to your last question along with the comments
If she is in the hospital long enough for Rehab Medicare pays 100% the first 20 days, 21 to 100 50%. None of these days are guaranteed. Medicare can have her discharged at anytime. Supplementals may pick up the 50% they may not. For my Mom they didn't. So I told the finance office they better do what they needed to in that 20 days because there was no money after that. She was out in 18.
This is where the rubber meets the road. Will you stand strong and refuse to allow her to return to your home? WILL YOUR H REFUSE, ALSO???????
Keep us updated.
SHE CANNOT COME BACK TO OUR HOME. WE CAN NO LONGER CARE FOR HER.
WE WANT A SOCIAL ADMIT.
Sorry to yell. That is what you need to say.
If they "threaten" psych until, ward of the state, say "yes, please".
Don't let them snow you.
UNSAFE DISCHARGE!! UNSAFE DISCHARGE! And if you want her to go to rehab make sure you know the requirements for her transfer. I believe that she has to stay in the hospital 3 full days (3 midnights) in order to qualify. Don't let them talk you into taking her home before that. Tell them that she is an unsafe discharge and you cannot take her home and that you need a social worker.
If you are concerned about mental health, tell you them you want a psych consult while you are there. Tell the charge nurse and the social worker what is going on. Do whatever you have to in order to keep her there and do not under any circumstances agree to take her home - they will help you but you cannot make it easy for them to "not" help you.
Be careful because they will promise you lots of services at home if you take her home. That's not what you want. You want them to send her to rehab at the very least to give you time to figure out your next steps.
From your earlier post she has the following:
1. Mental health issues
2. Bowel Incontinence and lack of awareness of proper toileting
3. Fainting spells
4. Multiple falls
5. Loss of hygiene
Add to that the fact that her caregivers can no longer provide the physical caregiving that she needs. You are going to have to stand your ground and tell them that you can no longer provide her care and tell them that she needs assessment and placement.
But use those exact words - UNSAFE DISCHARGE and do it with anyone that even mentions taking her home.
UNSAFE DISCHARGE
SOCIAL ADMIT
Take care of yourself, all the best
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