How do I tell Mom she has to move from assisted living to more care facility?
A year ago last May I moved my parents from independent living in Iowa to assisted living in South Carolina where I live. Daddy passed last November and my mom (89) in now in hospice with vascular dementia diagnosis. Mom is very content and the caregivers are wonderful; she loves them and they love her. The problem is she has a terrible bladder /UTI and can't void on her own. Hospice has been doing an in-out cath, giving anti spasm meds and a daily antibiotic shot in the muscle. If she doesn't respond, she may have to move to a nursing facility that can manage a Foley. Any ideas of how to keep her where she is? I want her final chapter to be familiar and peaceful. She requires too much care to have her move in with us, especially since I still work. Has anyone had a similar bladder/UTI? How did it turn out? Thanks.
I agree that since your mom is on hospice care, it would be best not to move her if possible. This is especially true since she is so content. I'm somewhat surprised that hospice nurses can't handle a Foley since many people learn to handle the hygiene part themselves. Could you hire a nurse from an in-home care center to supplement the care that hospice can provide? Most hospices work well with nursing home staff so I don't know why an in-home nursing coming on a schedule they coordinate would be a problem.
Not all in-home agencies have people qualified to handle medical issues so you may have to call around. I do hope that you can make this work out.
I'd like to add, however, that if you can't keep her where she is and must move her, don't let guilt eat you up. We have to do what we have to do. You'll be with your mom in all the ways that matter. If she must be moved to a skill nursing home, hospice is available there, too, and you'll also continue to be her advocate and loving daughter.
Please let us know how this works out.
Carol
Catheter hygiene and maintenance is very simple and I'm sure the nurse can teach you in less than 10 minutes how to do both.
Having an in-dwelling catheter will also be easier on your mom as you won't have to roll her from side to side to change her. And once it's in, it's in. No more straight cathing every few hours.
Your mom deserves to be comfortable.