I am feeling guilty about Mom's unhappiness with dementia. She wants to move in with me. I know I have made the right decision, both for me and for my husband and kids. I know my Mom is in the safest place for someone with moderate dementia. She's in great shape physically, but pretty much has zero short-term memory. I became her sole caretaker at the end of April 2016, and those of you active in this group may have followed along so far in our journey. We originally had Mom move into the house with us, and she was at my home for six weeks, but I knew within two weeks that I could not handle full-time caregiving while still having teen kids at home and a husband who shouldn't take a back seat to the situation. So despite reassuring myself again and again that I've made a good decision, I can't help but feel tremendous guilt when Mom expresses how unhappy she is. She seems to go in spurts, for several weeks she won't mention anything, and then for about two weeks it's all she talks about. (we happen to be a week into obsession over living with me.) The first problem is that she can't remember that we've talked about it, so we continue to have the same discussion. I'm pretty patient with repeating myself, and I try to come up with diplomatic ways to tell her that she kept wandering, and she was just as unhappy here. I try to re-direct her attention, but I have NEVER BEEN GOOD at thinking on my feet. I try to rehearse dialogue and have phrases at the ready, but more and more, those things don't work. You guys have any words of encouragement, or tips on re-directing, or just advice on how to not feel guilty. Now that I am "in charge" I constantly feel like I have to fix things for Mom, but some things I just can't fix for her. The last time we had a conversation about her living with us, she begged to "try it again" after I explained why it was safer where she was. I need to know how to tell her "No" but in a way that expresses caring and love. You guys have any tips????