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My mother in law always has had good hygiene. She now has demencia and still does fairly well considering she"s also 87 years old. She still can go into the shower herself. I stay very near ,outside the door. Even 2 or 3 months ago, she would say when she wanted to take a shower and now she hasnt been. I have told her before that I would help any way she needs.How do You all think i can tactfully tell her she needs to shower without hurting her pride. I DO NOT want to hurt her feelings............
Im VERY afraid she will get embaressed having to be told to freshen up......Please have gentle ways for me to go about this .. Thank all of you !!!

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Thank you!! I will put her stuff out and just tell her I thought she would like to try something new.I'll give her some of the stuff that I haven't been using. I know she isn't to the point YET, of giving up on showers

Good idea
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I too think you can make it like you are giving her a gift! Make the shower all nice and toasty for her, lay out a fluffy towel and get some nice shower gels and maybe even a soft loofah. (I think they make the puffs on a long handle thing). If still refusing, I can tell you this. She is WELL aware that she can't smell things like she used to. I promise you this. I would gently say that it's not healthy to only take a shower once in a while and while you know this may embarrass her, you want to let her know that sometimes there is an unpleasant odor from her. Tell her that you wanted to tell her so that she wouldn't be embarrassed by others saying something either to her or behind her back. You love her so much that you wanted to save her the embarrassment. That's what I had to do with my mom. Hope this helps.
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Possibly you could get some nice shower gels, a pretty wash cloth and towel, ect, and tell her you have a surprise for her.... then gently suggest a shower.... to try out her new goodies.... Sonny has gotten to where he doesn't want to shower, but what I do is get everything ready, then in a 'happy' voice say 'shower time', he grouses a little, but it gets done... he can bathe himself, like you, I am just a step or two away in case there is something he needs.... does she have a shower chair? maybe she is afraid to get in the shower... and the fact she has dementia, it is just very likely she simply has forgotten how long it's been.... and no, you don't have to be mean, but you can make it fun... let us know how it goes for you.... hugs.
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My mother has the same problem,she goes to the doctor once a month and thats the only day she takes a shower.Once a month isnt enough for ones personal hygiene.I tell her she needs to shower more often and she gets mad at me.I have even seen her fake taking a shower,she goes in there and turns on the water for 5 min then comes out and goes to her bedroom.I will go in there and the wash cloth and soap isnt even wet.Its not like she has problems getting in and out of shower she is only 78 and can walk ok.All I can tell you is just tell her she needs to shower more often,she might get mad but then again you dont have to smell her .
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