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Many on this forum know me - I'm a private pay in home caregiver. I love what I do. Currently I have two clients. I care for an elderly couple in Bothell, WA. She's had a hip replaced, and he has Vascular Dementia following a stroke. At first I was pretty miserable because all I was expected to do is clean, clean, clean and I'm NOT a housekeeper! But it's worked out, and I have a good balance of Dementia care and helping her in the house. I also care for a woman with Lyme Disease - advanced. She's very weak, and very needy. BUT, on top of this, I have a home-based business which has suddenly grown and is set to double again in the next week or two. This definitely will require my full time attention.

Here's my dilemma - for you who are family caregivers who hire folks like me to help out. My thought right now is to take the entire month of May off, and quite possibly not return to caregiving after that.

The Lyme Disease client will be emotional - I started as her transportation person about 3 years ago and it has progressed as she has deteriorated. The other clients are becoming more and more needy, too, as the wife realizes she just can't do this alone at her age. She has expressed a real fear of introducing a new caregiver to him because she feels he loves and trusts me, and she is hoping my hours can increase as his need increases.

Just looking for a discussion. I know that no matter what I do, it will be hard.

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Hi Ruth, I've been reading your blog. Even before I read the blog, I have always admired your sincere caring answers when I first found this site 2 years ago. This was before I found out that I can "follow" someone (found this out just a few months ago!) Anyway, useless to "follow" since I rarely scroll down on the News Feed to find out what's up with them (and I don't open my email alerts from AC.)

We (as in the family caregiver) will sure be losing a very valuable member of the paid caregivers. As I read on your blog the things you had to do for the "housework" while Don was depressed and to me- obviously wanting your attention, I felt bad that the family just didn't understand that He should have been your first priority before all those housework. I can just imagine how you must have felt, being the one there for them. Sad...

I wish you well and success in your new business. Don't forget to drop by once in a while to share some of your valuable experience knowledge. {{Hugs for success and happiness}}
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Thank you all. I submitted my resignation, got the hugs and tears, then acceptance, and I am helping both clients seek other care. It was eye-opening for the couple when I explained to the wife that I am being 99% housekeeper and care agencies will NOT allow this! I said she really needs a housekeeper and a caregiver. I am going to miss both clients a great deal. 3 more shifts with my couple, and 4 more with the Lyme client. Also - Veronica91 you are very correct that the Lyme client will soon require a higher level of care. Her family is thinking of moving her.
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No amount of time will be long enough when your clients are long term and trusting.
Your own need is urgent and helps secure your future.
I know you are seeking to be compassionate with these people so a minimum of two weeks will give them at least some time to begin the process of finding a new caregiver. Use the time to help them find another caregiver even if it is only someone temporary from an agency. You can offer to help them interview and train a new person and even after your notice expires they can pay you to continue the search on their behalf. Caregivers come and go all the time and it is difficult but not impossible to transition. perhaps find a local college that trains CNAs, they may have an older student who would be very grateful for the introduction.I have seen quite a lot of older CNAs who really should have a quieter job struggling in busy hospitals and nursing homes. Place ads in local papers and on bullitin boards and contact local employment agencies. basically everything you can think of to help your clients if that is what they want. Maybe it is time for your lyme disease client to transition to a higher level of care. I know you will do everything possible to help you clients but harsh as this sounds your future is more important.
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I agree with captain. Give as much notice as you are able. A month? Is that reasonable? You want to give enough time for them to find someone else and to accept that you'll be leaving. Are you able to train your replacements with these clients? That might reassure them too and make the transition easier.

I don't think you're really required to give more than 2 weeks notice but in your line of work that's a lot of change in a short amount of time for your clients and it may be a bit bumpy for them and I know you don't want that.
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Well, I chickened out with my Lyme client yesterday. She was in far too much pain. Gah!
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the old timers must realize by now that nothing is permanent ruth. theyve surely suffered many losses in their lives. i think it would be fair to give them all the advance notice possible tho .
in our construction community a floor covering man my age just lost his son of 35 yrs old. that strikes close to home and swamps lesser losses or changes we might endure.
just a perspective injection. your clients are only facing change, not permanent devastation.
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