I don't want to take care of my father anymore. How do I approach the subject of assisted living outside of our home?

That just sounds horrible does'nt it. My husband and I have been caring for my father for 15 years. He has lived in our home in an in-law suite that we built on for him. I have two brothers and two sisters and only one of them has just recently started helping us. My father has had 12 cornea transplants, has diabetes, arthritis, is depressed and sits in his part of the house all day now doing absolutely nothing but trying to watch tv and listens to the radio. I have tried to get him outside help by having someone come from the office of older adults to talk with him and offer him transportation options during the week so he can get out. He refuses. My husband and I work full time. I have to schedule all of his many doctor appts. late in the day or use vacation to take him. We have no real time for ourselves. He makes us take him shopping every Saturday whether he really needs to go or not. I understand his need to get out but he refuses help outside of ours. How do I approach the subject of assisted living outside of our home. He gets angry at everyone and everything that is not done the way he wants it. I want my life back. I have sacrificed 15 years for him with no appreciation. Maybe it would be different if he were a nice old man but most days he is not, at least not to us. When he is around other family members or out in public he is a totally different person.