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Lives alone in home. No longer drives. Diagnosed with mild cognitive impairment and impaired executive function by 2 different neurologists a few years ago. She was in denial about diagnosis and refused oral treatment. Few months ago, she started to think boy next door was dirtying her outdoor windows, cleaning them, only to repeat this cycle daily, sometimes a few times a day. In addition to other “damage” this “boy” has done, she now thinks that he is getting in her home and doing damage (ie/ scratching furniture, changing color of hardwood floor planks, damaging indoor windows etc. She has already called the Sherrif x2 regarding her “findings” We have cameras set up outside her home, and inside at entry ways. Despite trying to reassure her that no one is getting in or around her home, there is no getting through to her. She has refused have someone in the home paid to stay with her to “catch the boy” or us to spend night with her or stay at our home. She is truly convinced that this “ boy” is getting in her home, even though she has never caught him. Not sure if these are hallucinations, but she cannot relax, sit still as she is constantly looking for “damage” . ? How well she is sleeping. Message sent to PCP, and recent labs/urinalysis fairly normal. Have tried distraction, changing the subject, getting her out of house at least 3 times a week. Husband and I are at wits end. Any advice would be helpful. Thank you

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Yes, she is having hallucinations. They sound a bit like Lewy's dementia.
She was already diagnosed 2 years ago.
She is clearly now advanced in her dementia and no longer capable of living alone at home. She is in grave danger.

If you are not already her POA then it is time to call APS and explain that you are not guardian or POA and that she isn't safe at home anymore, and requires assessment she will not allow you to get. They will take over getting her into assessment and there you will work with social workers toward getting temporary guardianship or toward getting her guardianship of the state so they can get her to safety and manage her funds for her.

Good luck.
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This is her reality with her impaired brain and no amount of trying to explain things will change her mind.

Stop trying to get her to accept your reality. It’s not hers.
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Your MIL has progressed from MCI to full fledged dementia which will continue to worsen. She's not safe alone at home and needs 24/7 care and management now. She also needs meds to help her with her agitation and delusions which she cannot help! She's not in denial about her condition but suffering from anosognosia. Google the term for a full explanation.

Follow Geatons advice to get the poor woman placed in a Memory Care Assisted Living facility asap.

Best of luck to you.
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It does not sound like MIL is safe living alone. I am surprised that the Sheriff has not contacted a family member about the unnecessary calls. It may come that she will be charged for making calls.

There are medications that can help with the anxiety and hallucinations but if she is non compliant with medications that might be a problem.

the fact that she will not allow anyone in is a problem and a matter of safety since she may not be safe to remain in the home alone.

Good possibility that you will have to wait for some event that will force a decision.
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She needs meds for her anxiety/agitation and hallucinations. Since she's not compliant you have the option to call 911 the next time she is hallucinating or in a paranoid state. Tell them you think she has an untreated UTI (because if you tell them dementia they won't come as this isn't considered a life-threatening medical emergency, it can't be treated in the ER). Once in the ER they will test her for the UTI. You tell the discharge planner that she is an "unsafe discharge" and is not accepting medication and caregivers. They may offer to keep her in the psych wing in an attempt to get her on meds. At that point or afterwards you will have the opportunity to discharge her directly into a MC facility. Does she have a PoA? If so this person's authority is fully active they have the ability to make these decisions for her, as this is in her best interests. If she doesn't have a PoA is seems too late for her to be able to legally assign one. They you will need to either pursue guardianship through the courts or report her to APS who will put her on track for a court-assigned 3rd party legal guardian. At that point the guardian will take over all her management and decision-making. My family's experience with a guardian was a positive one, and the only real solution to a problem.
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