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At almost 92, Mom has decided that her happy place is laying on her R side, facing the window in her bedroom, and napping or resting. For much of the day. She does get up to bathroom and will go to kitchen or TV room for 5-20 minutes at a time, and then back to bed.


Explanations of why her ear hurt and benefit of changing positions made no impact. Pillow behind her back ended up on the floor. Tennis ball in a sock pinned to nightgown back when she laid on L side led to nightgown on the floor, sock still attached.


Currently there is a hydrogel dressing on R ear covering the open area.


New red areas on R shoulder and hip in AM, disappear once she gets moving around.


We can try adding a mattress topper to one to her mattress, but what type or brand would be a good choice?


Memory foam seems rather firm to me, but that may vary with the different brands.


She won't accept an air mattress, though we could afford to rent or purchase one.


Grateful for any advice you can share.

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You say your mom has life-long depression and passivity.

It sounds like she is going to say "no" to anything that's suggested.

Consider getting a medical recommendation for what she NEEDS and get it.

"The doctor ordered it, mom. I'll get in trouble if you don't use it."

Is she on Hospice? Something else to consider.
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Grandma1954 8/8/23
There are mattresses that have an air flow that look and feel like a regular mattress if she does not want to try an "air mattress" (I am presuming that she may be thinking of an air mattress as one that you blow up)
I should ask..is she in a regular bed or a Hospital bed?
A hospital bed might be better, you can adjust the foot and head portion so that even is she still is on her right side the pressure would be different if you change the position of the head and or foot daily.
And as far as purchasing a mattress discuss this with her doctor. The doctor may order a particular mattress and it would be covered by insurance.
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Redness areas can quickly turn into decubitis ulcers, requiring surgical excision and complex medical management. She needs an egg crate mattress topper like in a hospital. It distributes pressure.
Here's an example:
https://www.homedepot.com/pep/Mellow-3-in-Queen-Egg-Crate-Memory-Foam-Mattress-Topper-with-Copper-Infusion-HD-ECMF-C30Q/320643263?g_store=&source=shoppingads&locale=en-US&pla&mtc=SHOPPING-BF-HDH-GGL-D59H-059_013_TEXTILES-NA-NA-NA-PMAX-NA-NA-NA-NA-NBR-NA-NA-NA-%7C059_013_011_MATTRESS_TOPPERS%7C_PMAX_phase_1&cm_mmc=SHOPPING-BF-HDH-GGL-D59H-059_013_TEXTILES-NA-NA-NA-PMAX-NA-NA-NA-NA-NBR-NA-NA-NA-%7C059_013_011_MATTRESS_TOPPERS%7C_PMAX_phase_1-71700000110503238--&gclid=Cj0KCQjwz8emBhDrARIsANNJjS4xfxPuK4lEGLE4LIyAGRZh0WaKbaVLnXog6YcyvPk4ckuNOWSPZXAaAt3lEALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds
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I would forego a topper and get an alternating pressure mattress.
What is the reason for her refusing an air mattress?
By the way rather than pillows behind her use wedges. They are less apt to move and you can turn them to alternate the angle that the body is supported.
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