Mom lied, Daddy died. Mother, siblings & cousins withheld info, lied about abt Father's condition for 18+ mo. I rec'd email 3 days after Mom (Health Care Surrogate) & brother (Alternate Health Care Surrogate) pulled plug. Dad died on T-giving am 24 hrs after I arrived, starved 12 days.Stroke June 1, but was "really sick" prior. No one told me. Xmas call/cards '14. B-day cards to me June '15 said nothing. After he entered short term rehab for stroke, mom renovated the house, bought a new car, hired an interior decorator. Not exactly sure what she told everyone-something about my whereabouts unknown - despite regular greeting cards from me to many of them with same return address & regular email contact with sister in law. Am also named as Successor Personal Rep in their wills. Mom has habit of hanging up on me 30 yrs. Dad was "deaf." Sibs claim phone/email phobias, so I was sending notes & cards while still trying to have a child instead of being abused. Spouse & I treated like shunned people/Satan worshippers at funeral. Not a word of empathy. Acted like I was supposed to take care of them. Cousins said they are GLAD my father is dead & in heaven with his twin sister, their mother, who passed 5 yrs ago. Yay for me - I did not slap anyone or do anything but smile nod & look pretty. It was surreal & frightening when mom accused my husband, a licensed health professional of throwing her against wall in middle of hospice unit & eldest sister had the Director come in from day off to lecture us about hospice behavior. Due to location in FL we feared returning to hospice to sit with him overnight due to "cowards shoot to kill & claim fear for life" laws & mom's assault accusation so my dad died alone overnight. Mom claims there is a new attorney, new POA, & I failed my fiduciary duty because I did not put a piece of land in the trust. Wasn't my job until he was declared incompetent-she refuses to tell me when this happened.The family atty before hanging up on me said she was trying to replace me with my sister but he did not know how the docs would allow that. He did not respond to my email or attend funerals. She let slip he is still atty so doubt docs change. When I was waiting for my husband to return from his work here in NC - multiple days in another town, I asked Mom for her cell # & the new cells #s for my siblings. she said I could leave a message at the house if I needed anything. Claimed mobiles were banned by the facility so I could not talk to Dad - flat out lie. Told the nursing home to not tell me anything.I was dad's favorite merely because I was willing to listen to him & debate with him. Although no substance abuse or domestic violence is involved, the marriage of 50+ yrs was miserable on both sides. I learned I "was the cause" for being born "sick" Oct 2010. Jan 2015, I discovered video tape that revealed Mom made me sick on purpose. Mom also lied for 20 yrs about taking DES & never acknowledged 10 miscarriages as a result of birth defect-last 2012. Family is emotionally abusive with me as main target & dumping ground despite "golden child" accomplishments. I am physically disabled w/spinal injury as of early 2009. This whole thing is ugly & shameful - but not on my part. The family atty is assisting her in violating my father's wishes & has never given me one moment of guidance on what my duties as successor co-trustee are. Also have cousin who is atty who had major conflict of interest when he repped my dad in selling family business to a stranger after my father specifically asked me to leave major northern city to take over management of business & ease him into retirement. Destroyed both our careers/lives.Reason given was that I was a female. I later figured out my dad wanted my hubby to lay claim to my business plan so Dad could follow through on promise but Uncle kept throwing Old Testament confusion at him. Mother is trying to cash out annuities which Trust is supposed to be beneficiary of in order to buy a house near her wealthier friends that she simply cannot afford. She has no LTC. She will deplete all the assets & end up in nursing home of State of Florida taxpayer dime. She's 80. Her 90 yo sister is in better mental health but much worse physical health.
-I need someone to read the trust docs & will tell me what FL law is
-Tell me if Health Care Surrogate has legal obligation to tell Successor Co-trustee & if this relieves me of liability from siblings when they inherit nothing
-How to get injunction to stop Mom's dementia driven poor judgment, fiduciary failures, & hold them all responsible for emotional abuse of elderly & of disabled.
-Legal file at short term rehab & hospice was empty. Family atty refused to believe me or fax it over when I told him.
-How to find an atty licensed in NC & FL - have little trust for the north cent FL good old boy network who are after my father's property for development.
-Dad used selective deafness & memory his whole life to manipulate, Advanced Alzh dx was withheld