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My step dad passed away 2 months ago from cancer. I can understand that it has been a long and hard past five years, but I think she is being taken for her money! We live in different states and she is not interested in selling her house. I talked to her today, to find out that she has made contact with various men (3) through match.com. All three have asked her for money. The most disturbing is the one asking her for $15,000 to meet payroll or his crew won't finish the project. I reluctantly asked how much she has already sent him and she said $2,000. I about fell over. I told her that she needs to ground herself from the computer and destroy all cards that give her easy access to her money. That way it will take awhile for her to get the money.

She wants male companionship, but wants someone who is active and likes to ride motorcycles. She is 62. But I think she is not finding the right people!

What can I do to help her?

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My mom lost the ability to differentiate 10 from 1000. She really could not tell if $6 for a gallon of milk was cheap or expensive. This happened 4 years before she could no longer live alone and Two years before she had to stop driving.

The transition was from using to checks to using cash to using all credit. There was less of a paper trail for me and NO LIMIT nearly to how screwed up her decisions could be.

Finally I got her a debit card and only put $500 on it at a time. It sent an E-mail with her balance below $100. I put all her regular bills straight to checking. Took away her checks. Had a regular amount transferred to her debit card.
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All I can say is losing the ability to understand finances was one of my husband's first signs of dementia. He also became obsessed with Publisher's Clearinghouse and was convinced he was the next winner. Not saying your mom has dementia signs, but I keep reading this is one of the first clues. You might have her checked. Otherwise you might just have to find a way to have more veto power over her finances, keep checking the checkbook regularly.
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i would just be like look mom i love you and you know this but you have to stop sending people money that you don't know loll :)
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Of course your mother is not very old. Is there any chance of a form of dementia, or has she taken on a certain gullibility that could happen to anyone at any age?
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This might be a *bit* off topic, but maybe not.

If our parents give *us* or other family members large amounts of money, especially in their winding down years, that money is subject to a 5 year lookback when it comes time for Medicade. What are the implications of a medicade lookback when the person is giving *THIS* kind of money away to total strangers? Maybe that would be something to make your mom think about...

It makes me think that I would either get my name on her accounts so you can prevent her from giving her savings away OR I'd get my name OFF her accounts so you don't get caught up in some kind of weird financial tangle when the cons go bad... Good luck and best wishes...
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This really is scary. The only advice I can offer is to call a lawyer. If she is in her right mind there might not be much you can do legally. Not being funny,I'm being serious since she's giving money away ask her to send you an airline ticket & go talk to her personally. Maybe you'll have a better chance at talking sense into her one on one,face to face. She really needs your help FAST!!! She is really not thinking right and she needs stopped before she harms her finances for the rest of her life. Good Luck & hurry!!!!
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Wow! That's scarey! Any family members or close friends near by who could visit her and run away with her net modem until she can start thinking rationally?
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