I now have both my mom 85 and stepfather 89 living with me & my husband. My mom has all her documents in order and my stepfather refuses to put anything in writing eg Living Will DPOA etc. He has 3 grown children of his own grandchildren and great grandchildren. They refuse to help me obtain these things and say "he is of sound mind and if he doesn't want to get his documents in order they will back up his decision." And yes he is of sound mind but extremely difficult in everything. They cannot afford an AL and because mom has vascular dementia she is now very confused & doesn't understand what's going on except that he refuses to cooperate with us. I have 2 sisters that are equally not understanding that for my husband & I to take them both in then they both need to have their documents in order. He refuses to have any conversation about anything that pertains to End of Life eg Living Will, DPOA, what happens when they can no longer drive or cook or bath etc what do they want at that time of their lives. Neither one of them have any savings they live on social security, they keep their money separate, and each of them give us $325.00/month for their living expenses. That's hardly enough for their living expenses. We are at our wits end and don't know how to proceed.