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Living together
Going on for 18 mos; getting hard to handle?? .... follow thru not good
unable to make good decisions .... pay bills etc etc


In good health otherwise? 76 yrs old


Looking for non hostile well thought through intervention .... as is my business partner health as well as business & legal aspects
objective cooperation from her.... powers of attorney recommended
from professionals .....but she won't budge & gets hostile & threatening

Your description of her behavior certainly suggests early dementia. Having a business does complicate the issue. The symptoms will progress until she is no more competent to be involved in the business. Do you have a succession plan, a way to buy her out?

Does she have annual physical exams? If so, you need to accompany her to the next one and bring up these concerns to her doc. If she has no visit scheduled, I think you have to impress upon her the necessity of “routine” exam. I would mention what you have observed and how it's affecting the business. There are many causes of dementia and some are treatable and even curable. You both have to know what's causing her unusual behavior.
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to sjplegacy
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Fear. If you explain over & over that you are on her side, want to get help - together.

Most people here are scheduled for a major checkup at 75. It's a great time to bring up all sorts of issues & a good time to collect baseline info - blood tests, cholesterol, blood sugar, BP etc. Ask the Doctor about vitamin deficiencies, especially B12 (as this happens) which can lead into talking about the symptoms you are seeing.

My SIL has noticed changes & had her baseline health check. Was a bit scared but a good starting point to compare back to. She is now taking the next step to see a specialist for more thorough testing. She is scared, but would rather know what she is dealing with. Personalities will differ for sure.

Sorry I can't help more, all I can think of so far is trying to stand together & break down some of the fear.
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Reply to Beatty
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Oh boy! I don't think you will be able to convince her of her memory loss. She is probably frightened and becoming paranoid. You should now focus on how to protect yourself and your share of the business.

Your business agreement, does it include a section on competency of the partners and what to do in the event of incapacity or mental incompetence? Or how to withdraw from the partnership? It's probably time to dust it off and read it carefully or take it to an attorney or the attorney who drew it up originally for a consult.

Make sure she doesn't make any rash business decision that will oblige you legally and financially without your knowledge.
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Reply to polarbear
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NeedHelpWithMom Jan 11, 2021
Great suggestions!
(1)
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Welcome to the forum.

Can you provide a bit more information please?

I read your profile and it says that your partner has dementia/Alzheimer’s disease.

You state that she has no interest in seeing a doctor for memory issues and gets irritated.

This sounds like it is going to be quite a difficult challenge.

Do you have access to her medical records? Or can you at least fill her neurologist in on her cognitive decline?

Will wait for your reply to my inquiries.
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Reply to NeedHelpWithMom
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