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Well I started a live in 4 day’s ago. With a client. Her mind is pretty alert. I’m just here for safety pretty much. The client had a fall and before client could go back to living home there had to be a live in caregiver. The agency I’m with I just started pretty much and they do have a set rule for caregivers must be able to at least have 5 hours of sleep not interrupted. The first night this client was up and down all night every hour after midnight. I got maybe an hour of sleep. Where the bedroom I’m in.. I can barely hear her at all with the walker. And on top of that she doesn’t call out!! I told her over and over that she’s going to need to call out loud. She said she’s not going to call out at all because she said I need my rest. I’m pretty much wondering how do I even be able to let myself sleep risking barely hearing the walker from a far or wondering which night she will fall. I told the company they suggested a monitor. I told them what pretty much good that will be? The people I had in the past they would call out on them. I just heard someone moving around they could be just rolling over in their sleep. I slept last night from maybe 12am-5am and I have to be up at 6. There was multiple trips to the bathroom and when I say multiple one night 9 the least is 5. (This is a usual thing according to the family) (no uti). I’m starting to feel exhausted. I’ve done live in before but if that client got up more than 3x to notify agency… I don’t even know what could be done. I’ve told the office they pretty much said the monitor and to try to talk to the client. I did. I can’t force the client nor will I. What can even be done ?? Anyone had this happen !??? And the client likes to be to herself so I can’t specifically sit In her bedroom with her. Her rules. And in the day she doesn’t call out letting me know she’s going to walk to the bathroom. …… to me it kinda sounds like it needs to be three 8 hour rotating shifts than just a live in…

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You are suppose to work 19 hours a day? With no time off? You better check the labor laws concerning Aides in your State. Just because your a livin does not mean your there all the time. If you can't sleep, then an agency should be putting an aide on for night shift.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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NHWM,

Care agencies couldn't care less about their caregivers. Their only concern is making sure that money keeps flowing. They don't bother themselves to make sure that a caregiver is prepared for an assignment or even competent to be on it. Or if the environment they're sending them into is safe. Or if the client themselves is safe for the caregiver to be around. They put a person in a house, collect the money, and that's where their responsibility ends. There is usually zero agency support when you're on the job.
The last agency I worked for used to mandate all field caregivers to go to a workshop once a month at the office. To talk to us about how much they appreciate us and how they create a better and more productive team.
When it was my turn, I spoke plainly and honestly. I told the supervisor the best way to make us feel appreciated is to pay a wage that isn't an insult. I likened the administration's treatment of the in-home caregivers to Roman gladiators. We have no idea what we're facing on an assignment until we get there and we're on our own. Could be a guy with a net and a trident, could be two lions and an alligator. You never know. If a caregiver gets hurt or can't handle the position they get a "thumbs down" and they drag the next one in to take their place.
Then I left and never worked for an agency again. I was probably going to get fired anyway because I was trying to unionize us.
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NeedHelpWithMom Jul 16, 2021
That is truly sad. It is ridiculous to run a business that way.

I ignored the rules about not giving extra. Mom’s caregiver was a single mom. Her little girl loved pizza. I gave her money to buy pizza for their dinner. I bought her a few toys and art supplies.
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reneetaylor804,

That's what I always did on jobs. I went private care years ago. On cases where 24 hour care became necessary, I used my own people. CNA's that I know from being in homecare for so many years.
I will not ever do live-in and I don't recommend anyone else do it either. Not unless it's a respite care situation that's only for a few days.
Get out of this position. It's not worth it. Don't get convinced into trying a baby monitor or any other device so you can hear what's going on with her. It's all total bullsh*t.
No one can go indefinitely without getting a night's sleep. A human being must get into a deep enough sleep that REM sleep happens. That cannot happen if they are forcing themselves to stay in a light, twilight napping sleep because they have to be prepared to hear a baby monitor. Terrible things will happen to a person who tries to do this for any length of time because at some point you will crash.
Like when you're behind the wheel of the car. Or you will sleep so deeply that your client will take a fall and you will hear nothing.
Please for your sake, stop doing this.
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Reply to BurntCaregiver
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One person can’t be a caregiver 24/7, without burning out! The family and the agency knows this. You are not getting any rest!

Your client isn’t sleeping, so you aren’t sleeping. You sound very caring. You have done all you can.

I like the suggestion about rotating caregivers. Speak with the agency. Stand your ground and let them discuss it with the family.

Best wishes to you. I hope this works out for you.
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BurntCaregiver Jul 15, 2021
NeedHelpWithMom is right. There has to be rotating caregivers. Even if there's two and you split the week. Not one person 24 hours a day 7 days a week.
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Four days in… of course you’re exhausted. It’ll take time for both of you to find the sweet spot.
Take several 15 min power naps throughout the day. That helped me.
I agree that monitors are not as fantastic as your agency seems to think. I had a client monitor in my bedroom when I was doing live-in care. In spite of that, my client got up, very quietly as usual, one night and had a fall resulting in a broken wrist and multiple abrasions. The details of her fall have never been established since she had no memory of it whatsoever. I was asleep and didn’t hear a sound. Monitors won’t always wake you and they won’t keep the client from falling. All you can hope for from the monitor is to get to the client when/if you hear the client fall.
The only answer I know is to sleep in the same room with her but she won’t allow you to do that.
You need to alert the family again. Since she had a recent fall, that sometimes causes other behaviors that were not present before. That happened with my client. After her broken wrist, her down-hill decline went into full swing and she is now in a nursing home. It’s heartbreaking and trust me, you don’t want that to happen on your watch, you’ll feel guilty for a long time even though you aren’t to blame.
I agree with rotating shifts if you aren’t able to get some uninterrupted sleep but I have a feeling she’s just not settled back in after her return to her home. That might change given some time.
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Reply to IamAmy
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I wanted to add that when we tried a respite trip for 3 days, the care agency for my dad really pushed live-in, as opposed to 3 rotating shifts, as being better for a patient with dementia and providing better continuity of care (which is probably 100% true) but I worried the whole trip whether or not the caregiver was getting sleep. Next time, I will insist on shifts, so I can let go of that worry while I try to relax!
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Reply to Carolann2244
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If they are leaving their room to go to the bathroom a door alarm would be helpful. I had one for my dad when he was mobile. I also agree with a video monitor, it gives much greater peace of mind!
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At the very least try the baby monitor so that you could hear what was going on without having to get up, bonus points if it has a camera feature and two way communication so you can see and ask what he's doing. If he tends to rummage around and doesn't always need your help a floor mat alarm placed by the bedroom door would let you know when he's headed to the bathroom, although setting up a bedside commode and/or urinal for him to use at night might be a better option allowing him to take care of things without having to worry about falling. Beyond that - nap during the day when he does.
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Reply to cwillie
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I think you should go with suggesting to the company the 3 rotating shift idea. Best solution from someone who has first hand knowledge of the situation.
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