BigMike, since your father is a Vet and has combat service, has he registered with the VA? There would be more professional care through the VA than by your sister.
In addition, it's erroneous to interpret being proxy under a POA as "having power over" someone. The proxy serves to facilitate the principal's needs, not control him or her. Your sister apparently doesn't understand the purpose of being proxy.
In addition, is this a Living Will, or medical POA? If not and it's a financial one, I don't see how she has authority to control his meds.
If he is on hospice he will not be given meds that will extend his life. But he should not be in pain, hospice should give him enough medication so he is comfortable.
MIke, the thing for you to do here is to call the Ombudsman for the nursing home and explain the problem to them. See if they will take action and investigate what is going on.
The information about how to contact the Ombudsman is clearly displayed in the NH.
So she has told us she has papers saying she has power of attorney over him. I’m trying to get a copy of them but have not been successful. She has moved him three times in the past year clamming the nursing home was over meding him. Now this nursing home says they can’t give him meds if she requests them not to. When on his meds he sleeps a lot which I think is normal for someone 90 with a Alzheimer’s. He has pancreatic cancer and several pined together joints from serving in Korea. Without his meds he is now groaning all the time and fighting nurses. He is on hospice and has a VA nurse. Not sure why the nursing home hasn’t stepped in or if they even can.
Nursing homes usually give meds directly to the patient. Not sure how your sister is getting in the middle of this. What kind of pains? Is he on hospice?
How is your sister able to apparently counteract medication orders presumably issued by a doctor at the nursing home? Have you raised this issue with admins, especially those dealing with meds?
Not a lot of information here so can't be specific. Call the social worker at the facility. Ask for a care plan or care team meeting at the nursing home, explaining that you are concerned about your father's comfort. Discontinuation of some types of medications are appropriate for someone who is 89 and in poor health. Pain can be hard to assess, and elders in nursing home can have a lot of trouble accurately interpreting their environment.
In addition, it's erroneous to interpret being proxy under a POA as "having power over" someone. The proxy serves to facilitate the principal's needs, not control him or her. Your sister apparently doesn't understand the purpose of being proxy.
In addition, is this a Living Will, or medical POA? If not and it's a financial one, I don't see how she has authority to control his meds.
The information about how to contact the Ombudsman is clearly displayed in the NH.
Can you tell us the whole story? We'd be happy to hear it!
Ask for a care plan or care team meeting at the nursing home, explaining that you are concerned about your father's comfort.
Discontinuation of some types of medications are appropriate for someone who is 89 and in poor health.
Pain can be hard to assess, and elders in nursing home can have a lot of trouble accurately interpreting their environment.