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Hello. I am very concerned about my boyfriends father. He has a history of cancer and diabetes and numerous health issues at the age of only 55. He has been thru a lot over the past few years and he is slowly deteriorating. Currently his arteries are clogged and a major one in his neck that goes to his heart is clogged as well. He has been in and out of the doctors but is now giving up. He refuses to go back no matter how much my boyfriend begs and pleads with him. He doesn't want to live like this anymore and thinks he would be better off dead. It's tearing me up inside because they just recently reconnected, his dad was sort of a dead beat dad his whole life into drugs and alcohol. I would hate to see him go now after everything. So my question is: Is there any way we can force him to go to the hospital? He is putting himself and others in danger as I look at it because he's having bad dizzy spells and still drives daily. What do we do??? Thanks!

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If he is still mentally competent you can't force him to get care or go to a hospital. If it gets bad you may have to call 911 get him to the er for help. But if he refuses to be admitted or cooperate I don't think he can be forced. Does he have any medical directives like DNR?
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Take away the keys, hide them. Have the doctor tell him he is unfit to drive, and dangerous. DMV will deny is license. It happened with my aunt. No more driving. let him live his life out the rest of the way. He has done so all these years. Just because he decided to make connection with his son recently won't make him get healthier. Perhaps he just wanted tie up loose ends. He is doing this...Better late than never... Your boyfriend should be happy about this. Spend quality time, not quantity time. MOvie night at his house, story time..Time to forgive and appreciate NOW.
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If your boyfreind and dad are truly enjoying eachother company than it's okay..... Don't fight him.
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If he has had cancer, he may believe it's returned. Not a particularly good thing. He's the boss, applesauce. It's his call to make. Support him and you and boyfriend try to put it out of your minds. Enjoy what is.

If you believe he's an unsafe driver, go to or call his local police station and ask what you might be able to do. Every state is different.
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I think your bf's dad is "giving up" because the medical system seems to have given up on him.
The simplest thing I could recommend is that you share with him anything by Dr. Sherry Rogers. She is a lifesaver.

She will send out a packet of free newsletters packed with information (almost all text, -- little space wasted on pretty graphics and pictures) on how to literally reverse and cure thngs like heart disease and cancer.
She does not claim to be anybody special. Just a doc who does her job and actually keeps up with the science -- and mantains her independence.
A second alternative voice that can bring hope, as well as useful information, is my doctor in the Chicago area. This is a recent one that is very pertinent to your dad's problems and covers solutions. His show is high-energy and obviously it aims to get patients into his practice, but beyond that, is highly educational.

Listening to him will help confirm that you're not crazy if you suspect something is really, really wrong with establishment medicine and its frequent lack of answers and frequent failure to adhere to known best practices. 
Best to all of you.
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