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He wants to empty out my mothers' entire house within a week of her passing. i live at her home and took care of her for two years for the family and my mom. I feel bullied, overwhelmed, unable to grieve her passing. It is all about money and getting it down; I need time to sit and be and sort slowly. he is trying to make all decisions without me - we haven't seen her lawyer yet and the will hasn't been read even. what am i going to do?

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Gosh poor you how low can these siblings go? I am too living at home I am not executor of the will am going to ask my mum to make amends to protect me if she died tomorrow surely they couldnt kick me out?

really sorry for you but I really dont think he can do this. Am just horrified how can you do this to someone whos grieving?? Am I totally naive or could mine do same never thought about this.

stand your ground and stay put! HUGE HUG!
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Tell your brother to back off in no uncertain terms. He cannot lay a hand on anything in that house, or any financial assets either, until the will has been read and probate started. There are very strict procedures to be followed and he could get in legal trouble if he forges ahead without proper direction. Furthermore you are living in the house and he cannot barge in on you and threaten your right to live in peace and grieve as you see fit. Get to an Elder Law attorney NOW, and he will let your brother know that he is violating the responsibilities and duties of co-executor by behaving as he is now. I am so sorry for your loss, and know it is hard to put grieving on the back burner, but you need to act fast. Stand Tough and Good Luck.
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Put your foot down and remind him that you are also the executor and that you lived in that house. I would get the lawyer involved if you feel you are being pushed around, he will set your brother straight. Also, one final thought, don't sell your mum's house empty, sell it furnished. An empty house takes much longer to sell. Good Luck!
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I agree with all the above answers. You were Living with your mom in her home, your sib needs to back off, the will hasn't been read or put into the probate process so he really doesn't have any right to try and make you start clearing out her home. Change the locks, see an attorney, stand your ground as this has been your home for the last 2 years.
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Beware of the green eyed monster!
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Do you have a copy of the will? Where is the original will....is it in an a law office? In it does it specifically name both of you to be co-executors? If so, then the both you will have to take it to probate court.

What does her will read as far as the disposition of her assets? If the attorney who drew up the will is still in practice, I'd contact them for my probate attorney first.

i'd suggest you contact an estate or probate attorney ASAP to start on this and you contract with them so they are your person first & foremost. You can't be passive about all this. I know it's tough and you are still grieving but you have to be pro-active and get yourself involved in all this from the beginning. Ask how long probate can run in your state. Whatever the timeframe is for probate, you do not have to file immediately. Getting an attorney doesn't mean you have to file right then either. You can literally wait on starting probate for quite a long while and presenting the letter of testamentary which opens probate, unless there is a pressing immediate need (e.g. a house about to go to foreclosure). Then you have a while to have it open. Like in TX it's 4 years you can have probate open

Whatever you do you HAVE to go to probate hearings to state your position on what to be done with the house, present the details on whatever you may be owed by the estate for expenses you paid on the house or for your parent. You want to submit a bill to the estate for any & all expenses paid since mom died too.

Oh & if there is any"management" or administration of the estate being paid, you need to get 50% of whatever it is that your sibling is getting. So if he is getting 2% of the estate for management or $ 500 a month or whatever, then you should be getting that also as co-executor.

Perchance was Medicaid involved for paying for any of mom's care?
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Change the locks on the house, freeze all accounts. Get a lawyer to help you, and act ASAP. Your brother won't like it but he won't have a legal leg to stand on. An estate must be handled correctly and as co-executor it is your responsibility to see to that.
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