My father calls me names like ‘mouthpiece’ and says things like— if I see your face I won’t be happy. He has threatened to ‘make trouble’ for me over items my late mother gave me in her will. Just recently he told me that he was so angry at me that he might have hit me if we were in the car together. I have set the boundary that I will not visit unless he stops this abusive behavior. He will not even consider stopping and blames it all on me and wants me to listen to how I am provoking him to behave this way. I do not engage— I just tell him unless he is willing to stop the abuse I am not coming. He is in rehab and I have to go to a care plan meeting this week. I am dreading it. It’s not about me, but in fairness (to me, my family and my health) I cannot commit to any type of care for him. All my life when I tell people about the insults and threats they say— oh, he’s such a nice man. Bottom line is they don’t believe me until they really get to know him. Then they are so apologetic but until then I am just a daughter who doesn’t care for her elderly parent. How do I broach the subject with the social worker? Or should I just go to the meeting, be silent and remove myself from the situation when he gets out.