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Op said her marital relationship has been non ideal even before the introduction of mom. It could be that the both of them subconsciously feel like hanging on for the kids’ sake, but they’ll both be graduating soon.
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Jamelle - I've read most of the back-and-forth and one thing that stands out to me is that you possess a rare kindness and grace.

What a lovely woman you come across as being. Your husband and children are surely blessed because of you.

I totally understand how you feel in this situation and the best advice that I can give to you is to pray about it. Take it to the Lord and spread it all out before Him until you have a solid conviction about what to do.

It's not wrong to place your mother in a nursing home or whatnot, as long as she is being properly cared for. Caring for a loved one at home is not the only answer. BTW, I am not suggesting that you place your mother - I'm caring for my mother in my home for the past 7 years and I wouldn't have it any other way.

I can tell you this - whatever The Lord calls you to do this situation, He will equip you to do it. I wish you peace and blessings.
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