Should I let her go home? - AgingCare.com

Should I let her go home?

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Mom wants to go back to living in her own home thinks she can take care of herself.

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Susan, she doesn't have the skills to live alone. Research the finances and the care options.

Consult with her doctor. Sometimes elders will listen to them, and not to us.
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She needs help with walking, preparing food, toileting and bathing. She says my house is too small needs to go back to her house to take of business. She feels she can care for herself. She was not getting proper care living with my sister and brother nearby ended up in rehab. I wanted her to live with me for better quality of life but she is not happy being with us.
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Apparently there is a reason that your Mom is living with you. When did she move in, and why?

Many elders are in denial that they can no longer live on their own. I was dealing with that with my parents who were in their 90's living in a home that had several sets of stairs. Both parents had mobile issues. Yet my Mom still gave Dad a honey-do list, having him climb ladders, etc. Mom still did all the cooking, laundry, house cleaning to the best of her ability. She refused any help. Made me a nervous wreck any time the phone rang thinking who fell now, and why.

Make a list of the pros and cons of Mom moving back to her previous home. If Mom can afford it, check out Independent Living facilities where she can have her own full size apartment, and still have Staff watching out for her... plus be around people of her own age :)
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Not knowing any background here, I'd say the question really is, IS mom REALLY able to care for herself? Get her doctor involved. Have some cognitive testing done, get an evaluation ( by an Occupational Therapist) with regard to her ability to perform Activities of Daily Living (adls).

Let's all reason from facts, not opinion and emotion.
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If you two are not getting along, look at other options, like Assisted Living. Sometimes they play better with people their own age.
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